Doodles
01-09-2007, 07:25 PM
Hi all - i've got a problem:
I'm 25 years old, some of you know me from the forums. I'm an artist with a nack for creating her own characters. I draw them, then write about them - and sometimes the other way around.
A little more about myself: (it's important for my question) I've jumped around a lot as a kid and i've seen a lot of things. I spent nearly 8 years in MO until I finally decided to join the military. I was discharged medically for myoclonus (muscle jerks). Anywho, in MO there wasn't anything that interested me. People would ask me what I wanted to do "when I grew up". I never really had an answer for them. In high school I didn't do my homework and was generally unmotivated. I could get an idea to do something, then about a week later I get bored with it and need to move on - I suspect this has to do with moving every 2 years. So you can imagine how living in MO for 8 YEARS would do to me.
I went to a junior college after high school and was fine because I was doing what I liked. However...I started having to take the same kind of classes to "progress" in the program and get my degree....I got bored and dropped out.
After that I entered the military and that was fun, but then my myoclonus started up and they eventually decided to discharge me. I moved back with my parents because I had only a little money and a 0% dissability rating from the military. I've been trying to get the VA to pay for college - but it's hard to find a doctor who will help you prove knee problems and carpel tunnel if you can't afford a doctor.
I'm trying to get into an expensive private school. It's a film school - i'll be going into computer animation - and it's MONDO EXPENSIVE!!! I'm sure the VA will be able to help, but they are being slow.
My problem is that I'm becoming complacent again and a little bit depressed. I'm getting job at the local movie theater - because it's fun - and the local Pet Smart (these are only interviews so far) to pay for bills until I can start school.
I get into a funk any time "money" comes into conversation. I start a rant and rave and then a funk. EVERYONE is telling me that I should just "suck it up and go to school - you can pay for student loans when you get out of school and into a job". But I'm just not good at going to school. I'm not good at networking and meeting new people which is a pivotal part of going into the film business. Doubts have arisen about going to this school so i'm looking into online school so I don't have to move again - I'm just not ready yet.
First of all, I'm not really interested into going to school, but because(i'm guessing) I got used to living in the country side in a small town, I don't know anything about anything else. I don't know what else to do as far as an alternative to school. I am well aware that school and getting a degree is important, and I know i'm not going to be able to work at Pet Smart and the movie theatre for the rest of my life. I'm thinking about getting into comic books, but don't know how.
I know that i'm smart enough for school, I just don't care for it. I haven't done homework assignments since the beginning of High School. It was just boring. After that I just lost interest - the teachers were no help and the school counselor was a nasty tempered woman(not someone one could poor their heart out to).
On the other hand, school will be a good career foundation and I would do special effects for the movies. There's just not enough money pooring out of my rear end to pay for it.
I just don't know where to look - I just don't know what else to do.
My myoclonus has made me even more self-concious than I am already because I could be talking to someone and then my arm starts to jerk or my jaw and I stutter my words. It's nothing I can't live without it's just hard to feel confident enough to meet people and to be in a job. I can handle customers with the best of them, but meeting guys and prospective employers isn't fun.
thank you for reading my ever lengthy rant, if you have any suggestions, comments...insult, complaints (lol, lol) It would be appreciated
I'm 25 years old, some of you know me from the forums. I'm an artist with a nack for creating her own characters. I draw them, then write about them - and sometimes the other way around.
A little more about myself: (it's important for my question) I've jumped around a lot as a kid and i've seen a lot of things. I spent nearly 8 years in MO until I finally decided to join the military. I was discharged medically for myoclonus (muscle jerks). Anywho, in MO there wasn't anything that interested me. People would ask me what I wanted to do "when I grew up". I never really had an answer for them. In high school I didn't do my homework and was generally unmotivated. I could get an idea to do something, then about a week later I get bored with it and need to move on - I suspect this has to do with moving every 2 years. So you can imagine how living in MO for 8 YEARS would do to me.
I went to a junior college after high school and was fine because I was doing what I liked. However...I started having to take the same kind of classes to "progress" in the program and get my degree....I got bored and dropped out.
After that I entered the military and that was fun, but then my myoclonus started up and they eventually decided to discharge me. I moved back with my parents because I had only a little money and a 0% dissability rating from the military. I've been trying to get the VA to pay for college - but it's hard to find a doctor who will help you prove knee problems and carpel tunnel if you can't afford a doctor.
I'm trying to get into an expensive private school. It's a film school - i'll be going into computer animation - and it's MONDO EXPENSIVE!!! I'm sure the VA will be able to help, but they are being slow.
My problem is that I'm becoming complacent again and a little bit depressed. I'm getting job at the local movie theater - because it's fun - and the local Pet Smart (these are only interviews so far) to pay for bills until I can start school.
I get into a funk any time "money" comes into conversation. I start a rant and rave and then a funk. EVERYONE is telling me that I should just "suck it up and go to school - you can pay for student loans when you get out of school and into a job". But I'm just not good at going to school. I'm not good at networking and meeting new people which is a pivotal part of going into the film business. Doubts have arisen about going to this school so i'm looking into online school so I don't have to move again - I'm just not ready yet.
First of all, I'm not really interested into going to school, but because(i'm guessing) I got used to living in the country side in a small town, I don't know anything about anything else. I don't know what else to do as far as an alternative to school. I am well aware that school and getting a degree is important, and I know i'm not going to be able to work at Pet Smart and the movie theatre for the rest of my life. I'm thinking about getting into comic books, but don't know how.
I know that i'm smart enough for school, I just don't care for it. I haven't done homework assignments since the beginning of High School. It was just boring. After that I just lost interest - the teachers were no help and the school counselor was a nasty tempered woman(not someone one could poor their heart out to).
On the other hand, school will be a good career foundation and I would do special effects for the movies. There's just not enough money pooring out of my rear end to pay for it.
I just don't know where to look - I just don't know what else to do.
My myoclonus has made me even more self-concious than I am already because I could be talking to someone and then my arm starts to jerk or my jaw and I stutter my words. It's nothing I can't live without it's just hard to feel confident enough to meet people and to be in a job. I can handle customers with the best of them, but meeting guys and prospective employers isn't fun.
thank you for reading my ever lengthy rant, if you have any suggestions, comments...insult, complaints (lol, lol) It would be appreciated