01-08-07 How Bout A Roll Call! :)

[dizzy]

GOOD MORNING! :)

I thought maybe a famous roll call might be just the way to start our morning off here in the addiction forum! I hope and pray that you all have a pain free/drug free day today!

Let me take just a moment to tell you about myself! If you are from the old forum u may remember me as SCT or Sly1....haha, lost the pw to both! So here i am again, dizzy! Yup, I'm as dizzy as they come anymore! The cycle of addiction has driven me in circle for years now!

For those of you who don't know me or remember me, I am the spouse of an addict, I at one time thought, hey, he's in recovery now...he's doing good, and really for awhile, he was! HOWEVER....I'm not so sure the recovery was recovery! Methadone maintenance was used for assistance getting off oxycontin and cocaine....eventually, I learned the methadone maint. program he was in allowed him to continuously increase his dose, (wow, have they forgotten how slick an addict is)....they ask, how are u feeling today, has the dose this week been enough? DUHHHHH...an addict not ready for recovery is gonna say "not too good still feeling irritable, having cravings, etc) ok Mr. Doe, let's increase by 10 mg once again this week. This went on until my husband was up to 240mg of methadone!

Eventually, my husband had to go in for back surgery....he told his dr. he was on methadone for drug treatment, so the dr. decides, let's use this for pain control then! Ok....now, ummmm...4 years later I guess it is he is still on methadone, however, the dr has gotten his methadone down to a lesser dose, he's dropped 80 mg! WTG!!! NOT.....now, our battle has begun again!
Over the past month, if not longer, he has started using crack! Blind, maybe I was, hard telling really how long he has been smoking it! The ugly addiction showed it's face about 2 weeks before christmas! Naive as I am....I believed this was a small thing, he relapsed, fell off the wagon, and we'd get through it easily! After all, we've dealt with a relapse before! WRONG AGAIN! It showed it's ugly self again 2 nights ago!

I started a thread last night, asking for info on the drug..I know very little about crack! I honestly wasn't sure he was high when he came in a couple of nights ago...but he had this look on his face that told me, yup....I think he is! I don't know what to watch for, I don't know the real power of this particular drug!! You guys helped me before and I really hope you can help me again!

Sorry to start your monday morning roll call off with a lot of reading! I just wanted to let u all get to know who I am!

Your friend,
Dizzy

[Kaiti]

Hey Dizzy,
Sorry to see such pain in your life. While I have never done crack, a couple fo people I am friends with have. When I speak with them, I'll ask them about it. They don't do it anymore (OK, that I know of) but they are very honest in to what to look for, moods, etc.

So, keep in touch
Kaiti

[dizzy]

Ty Katie! I sure hope peeps will get back here! This was such an awesome group!

Teresa

[Kaiti]

I agree, give it as little time and I'm sure they will, until then, we can just chit chat and be the welcome back wagon:cool:

[Motocrossed]

Hey everyone,
I've been addicted to oxycontin for about 6 years now. On again, off again. I had 8 months clean last year but am in deeper than ever. Wife divorced me a few months ago, don't blame her. I just can't seem to shake this monkey off my back! I need real help. Today, I throw up my arms and ask for help. I can't live like this anymore........

[Kaiti]

Motocrossed,
Welcome and hope to see you post any concerns.

I threw up my arms a little bit ago, and while it has not been an easy task, it has been manageable.

I take it from your name that you like bikes? am I correct in assuming such? If not, put me in my place and tell me so;)

Take Care and hollar when you need to.

[houghchrst]

Hi my name is Chris and I am a recovering crack addict. I know all about and understand the lies, that you tell yourself and others. I know the things that will be done to get the next fix. The deciept, the stealing, the conning, the begging, pleading, the self hate and the disgust that you feel with yourself and what you are doing to yourself and others. the despair that is felt because you hate what you are doing but are compelled physically and mentally to do it again and again. It is an insidious drug but it must be stopped before it graduates to heroin or something worse. Is there any kind of therapy and physician involvement with this particular problem. I did outpatient treatment. If you have any questions just ask and I will look to see if you posted anywhere else.
Christina