Roll call for August 12, 2009

[teddiebears]

HELLO!! :D

Hope everyone is doing/feeling well. We're still having some very warm and humid days here. I have been outside but only for short periods of time and then only when absolutely necessary. lol Staying in my nice air-conditioned apartment suits me fine!! ;)

Just so you all know, I didn't make a mistake when listing the date for this roll call. I'm deliberately posting a roll call for tomorrow since it's so late in the day. ;)

This reading, taken from Believing in Myself (Daily Meditations for Healing and Building Self-Esteem) by Earnie Larsen & Carol Hegarty, really "hits me where I live", as they say.......


Love thy neighbor as thyself. - Lev. 19:18

If everyone followed this command from Scripture, the world would be a much safer, more nurturing place to live. The systems that create devastating self-esteem in so many of us would cease to exist.

Yet this imperative rests on the assumption that most people do love themselves. By nature most people tend to look to their own survival first; we learn how to protect ourselves. But that doesn't mean that most people learn to actually love, respect, and honor who they are.

How well can we love our neighbors when we're not at all sure that we deserve to be loved? What if we feel we have no rights, that our feelings don't count? That we are only as good as our work, that everything we do must be perfect, or that we are just basically unworthy human beings? If such thought and convictions are our starting point, what kind of love can we offer our neighbors?

If I would truly love others, I must first learn to love myself.

*************

Several years ago I remember hearing the scripture quoted above and I began wondering if any "neighbor" would truly want me to 'love' them the same way I 'loved' myself. :rolleyes: I didn't think too highly of myself in those days and I certainly wasn't "loving" myself at all. :(

I definitely had what I thought were survival skills - things I used to "protect" myself, but I wasn't actually protecting myself as well as I believed I was back then. :rolleyes: However, I can say without any doubt that I certainly hadn't learned anything about honoring, respecting or loving myself. To be honest, it never really occurred to me that I could have those feelings about MYSELF.

I wish I could say that I found a special formula for learning how to stop feeling so negatively about myself or that there was a 'magic moment' when it happened, but the truth is, I'm not exactly sure when the change in my thinking began. I don't know when I actually stopped feeling so utterly worthless and started feeling that maybe - just maybe - my life did count for something simply because I existed. One thing I can say with some certainty is that this is an area that I continue to struggle with on an almost 'daily' basis.

Speaking for myself, I believe that coping so much of the time with depression (that I can't seem to find much relief from) does have a lot to do with my inability to totally embrace myself with love and respect. Fortunately for me though, I now have a slightly better foundation than I did several years ago and I have experienced times when I really DO feel that I respect and love myself, so I have more reason to keep holding on and to keep working on this. :)



How about you????

Hope you have a peaceful, addiction-free day!!

[houghchrst]

Well you posted a day early and here I am a day behind lol.

Well for me.......I have aspects of my self that I like. What do you do when you like who you are inside but hate what you look like outside? Do you walk around with a bag on your head no, it would be better if everyone else walked around with a bag on their head :rolleyes:

I cannot make the two mesh. There is something wrong with me inside that I just can't fix the outside. I got rid of my drugs, alcohol, smoking yet there is still something in me. Food addiction I think. Though I have so many health problems I know it is not just that. Limited movement due to pain, thyroid etc.

But I like food. I like the taste of food. All kinds of food. Salty chips dipped in sour cream. Chocolate! cottage cheese bologna open face sandwiches, I know some are going eewwww!! Subway's Tuscan Chicken, sub which they just quick carrying dirty birds. I don't even really eat that much. Fresh fruit, fresh raw veggies, I like it all but I am a carb eater.

Well crap this turned into a whole nother thing lol.

I am always kind to others no matter who they are or how they treat me. I am sure there is a reason behind their attitude. The two crack headed prostitutes that live two doors down from me.........now if they knocked on my door I would treat them with the utmost politeness. Though they better not :D.

[Phil]

Hello Teddie Bears,

I'm sorry you weren't feeling well. I hope your feeling better. When the humidity is high, it can make it difficult to breath. Thank you for posting....and for the reading.

I have been in bed most of the day with a headache. It was very humid today. I did stop though and pick my inhaler up.

It's been nice to see the forum pick up...even if it's just a little bit.

Hello Christine,

I hear you about the food. I am inactive so I really have to watch what I eat. Chips and dip sound real good right now. I think it has been proven that SSRI's cause weight gain.

Talk to you all soon.


Phil

[outlaw2]

I'm late I know. Teddi I doubt my neighbor could take the thrashing i beat on myself with. so i just try to treat everyone decently. that might be worth another look.
right now i'm recovering from neck surgury. it got real bad they say my arthritis was trashing a nerve. now my arm has a tooth ache with numb fingers. sometimes it really burns too. i hope it gets to work repaireing its self.
there is something in the 5th step and on up that helps with the self love and service to God.
it is hard to follow instructions when these norcos don't do sh!t. my bad.
pain sucks
going for the ice pack now.
later hope everyone is finding a better place
ipod and ice ha ha frckin joke
pat

[batsinwonderland]

Hi everyone!

Teddie, I found alot of relief in doing an inventory last time I worked the 4th step. I found that I have good morals and that I am a good person. I have my moments, though when I still don't feel I am "enough"

Christene, I have lost over 90 pounds in the last 3 years. Yesterday was my 3year anniversary of my gastric bypass. I notice that people treat me better now that I am thin. When I was heavy, some people judged me unfairly. It's not fair, but it happens. Food addiction is real. Carbohydrates change our brain chemistry and some of us use it to change the way we feel.

Pat, My C4-5 fusion was 6 or 7 years ago. The pain has lessened considerably. All I do now is two one hour massages a month and an occasional alieve. The weight loss has helped.
Bless you all and I hope you all find the relief you need. :D

[houghchrst]

Bats I am sure a lot of my pain would be relieved by losing weight and I did find out that my insurance would pay for it. My doc that did my gallbladder removal bugged me to let him do gastric bypass but the thing is that even with surgery I am still me. I still have the same problems and if a food addiction is part of me then gastric bypass will not be a fix all.

Yes carbs definitely, bread, pasta. If there is no bread in the house then I feel like there is no food in the house. All of a sudden I am hungry for all these things that require bread. Can't think of or even really see anything else to cook.

congratulations on the 90 pounds. Best doc I ever had said that a safe optimal weight loss would be 1lb a week. I have lost 4 pounds in the last 2 months and am hoping to keep working on that. I have to not think about it though because then my cravings go into hyperdrive.

Pat here's lots of prayers for a quicker recovery.