Finding Positives

[Aspigander]

Okay, Mili suggested I try to find positives in situations, way back when I was new here, and I started a thread on it, but the thread kind of died down, so I figured I'd start a new thread. So here it is -- just a little exercise we could all benefit from, think about a situation that we find negative, and try to put a positive spin on it. For each negative situation I post here, I'm going to try to think of as many positives as possible.

Drat. I start this post and can't find even a negative situation at the top of my head to put in a positive light. Well I guess that's going to be my first negative situation...starting a thread about finding positives in negatives and not even being able to find a situation to use as an example. The positive? I know something will come up that will require a positive twist, probably before today is over. :)

[Kristen (ColeysMom)]

LOL!

Hey Lauren, wonder if you could pull up that old thread, and figure out how you could turn it into a positive. Not just find the rainbows in the situation...see if you could make lemonaide out of the lemons.

I can't remember the things off the top of my head, so don't know how ridiculous the idea is...I'm just thinking of it as an opportunity to develop problem-solving...maybe?

There's good & bad in everything right. It is hard sometimes to see past the bad and find the good....a bigger challenge, turn the bad INTO good...

[MomOTwins]

OK, I've got an example for you!

I'm currently between projects at work (I work as a contractor from a home office) and was getting frustrated by the fact that only little jobs that take a day at the most were coming in and big jobs (3-6 months of fulltime work) weren't. I HATE job hunting and marketing my business, it drives me crazy and frustrates me beyond words.

After growling and grumbling about not having anything to do in the office for a few days, I realized that this was a perfect opportunity to do long-delayed networking with other freelancers that I'd been putting off (because I didn't have time to learn about LinkedIn, a business networking site).

So, now I've got a LinkedIn address and have posted my resume, a set of other writer contacts that I can talk to about projects, lots of interesting job boards on the site to review for new prospects, and something that keeps me focused on getting out there every day and looking for work.

Here is a negative (the lack of work) that generated a positive (a relatively painless way to help market my business and hunt for jobs)!

Now I just hope that I get some work out of it.....:D

[Kristen (ColeysMom)]

WOW! Nice job MoT! Crossing everything for you!

[MomOTwins]

OK, got a phone call today from a headhunter who I think (he didn't say) found me on LinkedIn!

So, Lauren, good things did come from bad (at least for this experience)! We'll see if his client wants to hire me for their big project.

[Aspigander]

LOL!

Hey Lauren, wonder if you could pull up that old thread, and figure out how you could turn it into a positive. Not just find the rainbows in the situation...see if you could make lemonaide out of the lemons.

I can't remember the things off the top of my head, so don't know how ridiculous the idea is...I'm just thinking of it as an opportunity to develop problem-solving...maybe?

There's good & bad in everything right. It is hard sometimes to see past the bad and find the good....a bigger challenge, turn the bad INTO good...

I'm not exactly sure if I understand what you're getting at here, but here is the old thread (http://brain.hastypastry.net/forums/showthread.php?t=43832&highlight=positive+twists).

[Kristen (ColeysMom)]

Lauren I looked quickly...and really couldn't come up with a make lemonaide scenario...I'm not all together great at doing that so that could be the problem, but what seems a bit more likely is that your examples are more about events, not necessarily 'situations'...I think...

Like look at MoT's example versus yours. I think yours are more about reaction to events as the occur....which is great.

MoT's example is about a situation that will not necessarily change unless she takes action to make that change.

I think both things (seeing rainbows & making lemonaid) is helpful...

In MoT's example she could have just seen done this:

negative: not much work - bored, low income or whatever.
positve: not much work - no one to nag at her or whatever.

And ended there.

But instead she didn't just alter her perspective, she took some action. She used the 'break' to get past something that she had been struggling to get done...AND it solved the problem too (or should, hopefully).

See the extra step?

[Aspigander]

Ahhh, okay.

Here, when I read what you said about making lemonade, changing a negative INTO a positive instead of finding a positive in a negative, my brain jumped to this:

Hypothetical scenario -- someone gets murdered. Really gruesome crime scene. Victim is young child. I just couldn't see how that negative event could be made into a positive event, you know what I mean? But from your last post I'm guessing that's not quite what you meant.

[Kristen (ColeysMom)]

Yes but even that scenario could lead to lemonaid...

Let's say it's like that story that I posted about from my town a few weeks back.

Aparently the young man (23) had some mental health issues. Mom was a nurse. There are 2 surviving sisters (20-something & 9-who was injured).

The mom could use her background, and network to explore and advocate appropriate care for situations like this. Clearly 23, he should be working and have his own helath care coverage, but didn't, he was untreated...maybe even changing some laws or something...this could help others in the future...lemonaid

The 20-something could reach out to peers to be more aware of issues that may be in their own family...they could potentially identify and headoff issues in the future...lemonaid

The 9yo...eek...maybe she could reach out to other kids her own age that have gone through similar things...helping/supporting eachother through the healing process...helping herself & others at the same time.

I dunno...something like that...

Not saying any of this is easy...it shouldn't be I guess...I think it's all a matter of reaching deep for courage and pressing forward to not let a negative take over...in any way...little or big, ya know?