She was laughing, but it still really hurt :( (MAJOR RANT...)

[LIZARD]

My 17 yo daughter, healthy as a freakin' horse, is dating a guy who is a seriously picky eater. She loves to cook, and he said he hadn't eaten all day so he could eat her fish. :rolleyes:

"Well, you couldn't be me!" I told him. "I can't eat anything anymore."

"Yeah, Mom," Caren said, "if you find out anything else is wrong, I'm gonna have to call you a hypochondriac."

Dammmmmit. :( My body has been falling apart from all this autoimmune CRAP for the past 2 years (probably longer), and I have made such an effort to be a good sport in a houseful of people who can eat whatever the hell they want. (I nearly ran into traffic after a fight with my husband Tuesday about the toaster I bought and can no longer use since he put his damn bread in it. :( ) I don't whine to any of them when they eat pizza in front of me (as they did just a couple of nights ago), and THIS is what I get!!

I have had health issues all my life, which they know all about, and I get this crap. Hypochondriac??!! The LAST thing I want is to be sick!!!!!!!!!!! :mad: :mad: :( Why can't the people I live with understand that??!!

LIZARD, ready to run away...:(

[GFPaperdoll]

Oh Liz, I feel for you. I will just be very blunt here & say that your family is not giving you the respect that they should. I think that you should make your own plan to health & they only need to be informed of the part that will affect them. Really our kids do not want the details of our health, sad but true... I do think that a large part of that should be that you will have a completely gluten free house. If you will read any of the boards you will find that most all people do not really heal until they are in a completely gluten free house. I know some people disagree on this - but we are all different & some of us cannot tolerate that much cross contamination. If you were in a wheelchair they would have to make accomodations for you & the chair - I see no difference...

Glip remarks from a 16 year old, I know, although she meant it in fun... it can still hurt ones feelings. BTW, what are her household responsibilities?

Put yourself FIRST. Are you doing everything that you can to make sure that you heal properly? A rest in the afternoon, 8 to 9 hours of sleep, as much of your food organic as it can be, time to meditate & exercise, taking the proper vitamins for you, doing research for your health issues, doing things that make you happy, keeping all your required health care appointments...

a little reassurance, I know that you are going thru a rough time with the foods thing, I have been there believe me, but once I was GF those things got a lot better & I feel great - well except the past few days, I have a cold with some complications from an inhalant that I was exposed to... anyway, I still cannot eat GF grains or GF goodies so to speak. It is just whole foods for me. I cannot tolerate rice noodles etc either. But there are a lot of foods that I can eat now - it takes time & a paring back to the basics sometimes to find the problem...

[LIZARD]

Thanks so much for your kind, supportive words. :) I really appreciate it.

I know she's a kid, and I shouldn't expect a lot, but I just wanted to throw something at her. If she hadn't been driving, I would have. :rolleyes: She's going to college in the fall to major in biology, for God's sake.

I think they just don't get it. I have even said I'm not supposed to even touch bread to make them sandwiches, but when you're a house slave---uh--mom...

I will say that my husband is trying, but he's not one to look for info himself. He knows almost nothing about our son's Chiari, which will probably need (brain) surgery in the next year or so. I have asked ALL the questions and made all the appts. When he needed THREE eye surgeries in 6 months, I read up, but he hasn't done it for me. Sigh...

I know Caren made the comment because of my new finding of the Chronic Yeast and this annoying soreness in my thumb that refuses to go away, but geez...she coulda kept it to herself, huh?? UGH...If I die, they follow. :rolleyes:

LIZARD :(

[jcc]

Sorry to hear your daughter said that! I'm sure she did just mean it as humorous, but it does show she lacks appreciation of the real health issues you're facing. She's at that invincible age. Once shes goes to college, give her six months to a year, and she will be far more appreciative in many regards than you ever imagined. And continue to grow more so with each year.

Sometimes people just don't stop to think how their words might be recieved. My mom was in her final days of liver failure, and she was finally so weak she could not even get out of bed to get to her commode sitting next to the bed. My dad came to give her some assistance, and she was so weak she just dropped to the floor... and he accused her of "faking" it. She was screaming, pleading, "I'm not faking it!". For him, I think it was denial. Next she vomited blood, the ambulance was called, and by morning she was gone. No Dad... she wasn't faking it!!! She was really dying there!

And then there is my daughter (22) who actually has all sorts of chronic health conditions, that would likely be alleviated with a gluten free diet, but she refuses. Apparently she thinks I am a hypochondriac in regard to HER health issues. She appreciates many more things, but still not the fact that her gluten sensitivity is causing her health problems.

I am very fortunate that my dh is fully on board with our gluten free life, and stands up for us and supports us. But, when it comes to my dd, he reminds me I just have to let go of it. It's hard, because she continues to have all these health issues.

You do need some more support close to you! Do you suppose your dh would be open to a little heart to heart about how he is failing to support you? I've tackled other delicate situations by writing letters to my husband and/or daughter. It helps me to say what I want to say, and not say what I don't mean to say... if you know what I mean ;).

[can]

Hi Lizzard. I am also sorry to hear your "hard times" with your daughter. Personally, I feel most healthy people do not want to be tied down with " disabled ' people. My 60 year old sister just sent me and my other sister an email stating that she did not want anything to do with us anymore--quite a shock. This is in regards to me ( and my other sister ) not doing "much" to help my 90 year old Mom ( who still lives on her own and is in alot better physical condition than me--though she is failing mentally---plus we live 350 miles from my Mom and 60 year old sister ). My sister thinks I am faking it also. Regardless, I still sent my sister a birthday and Christmas card--of course, no reply---GO FIGURE

[pab]

Thanks so much for your kind, supportive words. :) I really appreciate it.

I know she's a kid, and I shouldn't expect a lot, but I just wanted to throw something at her. If she hadn't been driving, I would have. :rolleyes: She's going to college in the fall to major in biology, for God's sake.

I think they just don't get it. I have even said I'm not supposed to even touch bread to make them sandwiches, but when you're a house slave---uh--mom...

I will say that my husband is trying, but he's not one to look for info himself. He knows almost nothing about our son's Chiari, which will probably need (brain) surgery in the next year or so. I have asked ALL the questions and made all the appts. When he needed THREE eye surgeries in 6 months, I read up, but he hasn't done it for me. Sigh...

I know Caren made the comment because of my new finding of the Chronic Yeast and this annoying soreness in my thumb that refuses to go away, but geez...she coulda kept it to herself, huh?? UGH...If I die, they follow. :rolleyes:

LIZARD :(

NO,NO,NO! you do not need to make them sandwiches...period....
you are the mom, you do the shopping, the food prep. or at least are supervising.....what comes into your house from now on, is to be safe for you to eat, nada, zero, nothing else.....they want pizza, they can go out...you are not MAKING THEM take you seriously....get on that right now!
show them that this prob has the potential to shorten you life and make you very ill. and there will be no more gluten in your house...you have to demonstrate that YOU value YOU, or they wont.....

[darlindeb]

I too, know just how you feel. I have a son who has so many physical issues, and a few years back (I still am, as far as that goes) I was trying to get him tested for celiac/gluten intolerance. He was telling my sister, who is a diagnosed celiac, what I was thinking and she looked at him and said, "Don't worry about it Joe, your mom thinks everything is related to celiac." I was so hurt. She of all people should know what it's like to be sick all the time, she certainly was before going gf. Yet, she got better, and I have developed more and more issues.

It hurts...yet, sometimes they know not what they are saying. I would not wish my life on them, maybe for a day, so they would know!:p

[Zonulin]

And the weird part is, although your daughter is healthy NOW, a few more years of eating food that gives her a leaky gut will eventually take its toll. Whether she gets REALLY sick very suddenly or a little bit sick a little bit at a time (so hard to diagnose when this happens), it's only a matter of time. And then you can be the hero and say, "Here, darling - let me show you what I've been doing to feel better..." Until then, though....!! Those eye rolls and snide comments will continue because I think at the bottom of them is fear and uncertainty. (((hugs)))

Karen