Sad night for me tonight.

[GinaMarie]

Tonight was a sad night for us. I found Ashley my precious cockatiel dead in his cage. I named him Ashley because of his gray color (like ashes).
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I've had him for 20 + YEARS!
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LONGER than I've had any of my pets, ANY of my boys and LONGER than my marraige!
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I cried soooo hard!! My boys and I have held him, petted him, gave him love, and talked about him. Noah has told me maybe we can take him to the vet. I told him the vet can't bring him back. Ashley's eyes were still part way open so it was hard to tell if it was fully dead or not and when I got him out he wasn't fully stiff so I think he had recently died.
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Boy our pets sure are like our kids.. even if they are birds.. Ashley liked to talk. He said lots of things like "Ashley's a pretty bird" "birdy birdy birdy birdy", Good Morning Ashley" and so forth..
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We will bury him tomorrow. We have had a few days of rain so the ground will be soft and easy to dig thankfully with my back.
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I know he is just a bird and not like losing a child like some of you have. This is Noah's first real pet he remembers losing besides a praying mantis. He doesn't understand. Just thought I would post here as I know there are families that have dealt with loss (of even a pet) and can understand.
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I attached a picture of Ashley with our big male cat "Baby". Baby is hanging out on Ashley's cage and they seem to be having a chat of some sort. lol I miss him so much already.. Not sure if I want to get another one or not since Cockatiels can live up to 25 years.. That would make me almost 70 by the time the next one died!! IF I even lived that long!! lol

Thanks,
Gina Marie and boys

[milivica]

Oh Gina I'm so very sorry for your loss and grief. I definitely understand he was not 'just' a bird. He was a long time friend and family member. I'm sure he had a wonderful life with you and the boys, and enjoyed the blessing of a loving home and family for 20 beautiful years. It matters how he lived, I'm sure with you he lived well and loved.

My heart goes out to you,
I understand,
Lisa

[GinaMarie]

All the things that bird has heard over the past 20 yrs! Boy if he repeated it all!! He sure has seen, been thru and witnessed a lot and survived a lot.. You know how many cats we have had that we have saved him from and TRAINED to know NOT to TOUCH HIM or ELSE! lol DOGS also have been interested in him.

This bird has been with me thru my disease, sicknesses, marriage, miscarriage, seperation (first one with him), 4 high risk pregnancies and Nathan's 3-4 month bedridden pregnancies that was trying with their dad. depression, fights with their dad, diagnosis of the boys diseases, their therapies, their surgeries, my surgeries, 4 houses I think. and sooooooooooo MUCH MORE that I can't think of right now.. OHHHHHHHHHH the stories he probably could have told if he could have talked more. :p lol

There were times also when I thought he was saying "birdy, birdy, birdy...." when I THINK he was saying.. "kitty, kitty, kitty.." because when I open the front door and call the cats thats what I say and then Ashley repeats me and says the same thing but it SOUNDS a lot like birdy birdy birdy.. so I think he was actually calling the cats. lol

I used to want to teach him to say HERE KITTY KITTY... Then say GET THE CAT!! GET THE CAT!!! ROFL

He LOVED to preen my hair!! My hair goes to my knees and I would put him on my shoulder and give him a part of my hair or a strand of it and he would put in his beak and lean back almost falling off my shoulder and preening my hair thru his beak. Once he was let out of his cage and on our shoulders he DIDNT want OFF our shoulder and would hiss at us and snap at our hands. lol He DID NOT want back in his cage.

Cockatiels can live up to 25 yrs. MAYBE 30 but mostly I read 25 yrs. So Ashley did pretty well considering there were so many times I forgot to feed him or I would go check his cage and his water would be bone dry. He was so tolerant of me. He LOVEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD TOAST!!! Oh He KNEW when I was cooking it in the toaster!! He would get so excited and starte eating it out of my hand while it was still hot if I wasn't careful. I had to toast it twice to get it dark enough because birds cant have untoasted bread because of it swelling in their stomachs.

Anyway.. Thank you all so much for understanding.. So many are dealing with so much and actually I've been going thru so much this past couple months and this was painful.. But like the rest I WILL make it.. I will miss my buddy. I had come in the living room tonight and saw the empty spot where his cage had sat and it shocked me at first.. He has a big cage.. Tho now his cage is back there.. We had moved it at first to take him out.. I need to clean his cage now but later.

Oh my goodness.. I just found another precious picture of Ashley and Adam giving kisses together. NOW I have go to go bed.. SO MUCH for going to bed before 11 :rolleyes: . BUT this pic is awesome and I just saw it on my photobucket!! WOW how Adam has grown in just 4 yrs.. LITERALLY also probably.. I wonder how small he was then... and now he is 13 and is now at LEAST 5 FT 9 IN!!:eek:

http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g210/GinaMarieH/Pets/AdamgivingAshleykisses.jpg

HUGS to you all. Maybe I can dream of my precious bird. Tomorrow I will bury him. Poor Noah asked if we could take him to the vet tomorrow (hoping they could bring him back). . I told him that Ashley is gone for good. That he was old and it was his time to go.


uggggggggggg I better stop or I will start crying again...

[Keggy]

So sorry Gina. I kind of know how you feel. I used to raise lovebirds and I know about the bond you can have with one, birds are special creatures. I held one of my birds as she died and even though I hadn't had her as many years as yours, it was such a sad time.

[Kristen (ColeysMom)]

Gina I'm SO sorry!

Right now my furry princess that I've had for 15 years is not doing so well so I've had these worries myself, I can REALLY empathize. She won't be the fist pet that I've had for such a long time, spanning so many milestones of my life, that I've lost. It is so hard when a constant like that departs! My heart is hurting for you and your boys! [[[[hugs]]]] to you all!

I don't know if this will help Noah at all, but it did help Coley when he needed to deal with the death of his goldfish...

We had a little ceremony of course, a funeral at sea sorta. When we explained things to him, which as you could imagine he had a trillion questions. We told him that it was God's turn to be friends & play with his fish (Goldie & Ernie).

He told us many times after that he missed them, even wanted to know when it would be his turn again (which made us question saying that) but all in all it really helps him to know that Goddy (as he calls HER -- he decided God is a girl because that's the way she 'sounds', I think he means how she is described, mostly female traits) is caring for them now. I'm sure there are lots of ways to get that point across, but that was simple enough, ya know.

I'm not sure he really understands...but he does know they aren't coming back and he's secure in the idea that they are with Goddy.

Sending lots of loving thoughts! Give those boys a few extra squeezes for me, k.

KJ

[AKF]

I'm really sorry for your loss, Gina. Pets are so much a part of the family, and to have had one through so many hard times, it's so sad to let go.

I hope Noah will come to understand. It's hard for them to grasp it all.

Good luck to you and take the time to grieve. You've lost a friend and that loss deserves to be acknowledged.