what goes through your head when you say enoughs enough and want to leave

[Kashis]

Is it well he said he was sorry and won't do it again I will be ok its all better now but never look back at how many im sorrys were said

Do you think what will my children think of me will the understand

will he stalk me and kill me or the person who takes care of me

if you have left do you think to yourself your just invading someone elses life with your problems and just go back because you feel its your problem


do you tell yourself its going to be ok even when your being beating and mistreated mentally and physically but just deal with it casue it will pass

All us who have survived have had these thoughts and just took it for along time but something inside snapped in each of us and we made changes

I have now posted this so all us surviors can tell others what went through our heads what we did what changed us to help victims know that we were there we thought the same things and they will be ok just as we are now some of us our suvivors yet still have to worry but we have moved on in life

I want this place for victims to learn there not alone I want us as survivors to please post things to show them we were there and we understand there thoughts needs and fears now I must go tornado warning issued and I live in a trailer park and I tell yah abuse I was scared of at one time but now being home alone and having to get to the shelter now thats fear all my love Krissi

[Kashis]

I know I thought of the embarssement I would bring to my family if I reached out for help the critizim I didn't want to hear as I had heard enough already when being abused
And what about my children what would I do how I would i take care of them would I loose them to my abuser and never see them again

I know I thought I wish someone could stop him from hurting me and no one ever came and if they did after they were gone my abuse would be worse

I was afraid to shop for grocererys becasue I didn't want to get beat about the bill I was afraid to go out with friends as I was afraid of being told I was having an affair and when I did go out I was always checked up on

When I was being abused somehow it always came around it was my fault my mess I should deal with it but this is wrong and now I know better back when I was abused there was no help till the final blow that almost killed me and I truely belive I am alive now to help with my story and with my information that I have to offer

There are places to go there are people who care who know just what your going through with other victims who think the same as you do and you will move on to a better life leaving abuse behind

even if your a victim please if you can let us know what goes through your head so we can try to get you help needed and talk to you in an understanding way as we all understand we have all been there we all lived in fear Krissi

[Kashis]

If you are a victim and can post please let us know whats going through your head we can help we have been there we lived it and were here to make you a survivor too no one will ever know if your a victim or survivor just post this is what went on in my head or I have a friend anything so you can see were all here for each other Krisssi