Tuesday

[houghchrst]

Well Phil I think you were doing a mighty fine job with the roll calls. You will find that I am not much better when it comes to the rambling. I have a tendency to blather on about almost anything.

I can tell by how many views we get that not only are BT people checking in but a lot of others are reading and not posting. Perhaps they need a word of hope. Maybe they aren't quite ready to take the plunge. Maybe they have a morbid curiosity to see if we have crashed and burned :p nope. No plans to here. It's funny how often I am grateful that I don't do drugs or drink any more. When I can pay a bill. When I see the "bums" staggering around the neighborhood looking for a place to sleep at night. When I see that my ex-husband lives with his mother, my brother lives with our mother, or his so called girl friend. No car, no job, no life. What people don't understand is that when you start doing drugs and drinking and continue to do so you do not mature, you stay at that maturity level. My brother can barely function as an adult. So when you quit you have to learn to do all these things, you have to learn to live as an adult. So if you start drinking and drugging heavy at say 16 and never really move on with your life then when you get clean and sober you are pretty much still 16. You could be a 40 year old with a 16 year old mentality. Well for men that's not far off JUST KIDDING LOL. Sorry Phil, no offense had to throw in a bit of female humor.

My son, who is 15, informed me last night that he has lost all of his friends. He had a bit of a break down. He is bipolar and suffers from ADD and depression. I asked him what he meant and he said "what do you think" and all of a sudden it hit me, his friends have all started drinking and doing drugs. The experimental age. I was so full of emotions at that time, pride, fear, panic. He lost his friends because I am doing my job as best I can and he chose to take a different path, fear because he is still vulnerable and at risk and panic because now I want to help him find a way to meet new people that don't do drugs or drink. By the way, anybody with any ideas?

So we will take this one day at a time and that way we will not become overwhelmed and try to "fix" things with things that will not work, namely drugs, alcohol, sex, cigarettes, food (yes I tend to be a guilty of this one) I am a trader. Traded drugs and alcohol for cigarettes then to food. So I have the skills just need to use them. Or with anything else that interferes with leading a happy healthy life.

Have a clean day all.

[Phil]

Hi Christine,

I just saw your post. Thank you for starting roll call. I'm not ready to give up yet...that is getting a group together. You see all of these view's and wonder what the H ell?!! I can only think of a Kids in the hall in a skit where Mark Mckinney is in drag with braces on and at the end he looks up and says why, why, WHY???!!

I was up most of the night. I just couldn't sleep. I finally went to sleep around 10 and got up at 3 or 4. I am still tired!!

I'm not THAT old and I rember no drugs in middle school, none at all. I'm not that naive. I'm sure there were drugs but I never saw or heard of any. Those were the days of the mighty paddle.

I remember my Spanish teacher Mr. Martinez. He carried around an old fashioned yard stick and many a student got smacked with it for really, nothing at all.

I know there were pot smokers in high school because I could smell it and yes, I'm sure pills too. Your son needs to know there are those out there who do not use drugs. The brain grows until you are approximately 18 years old. I would say MAYBE just a bit longer depending on genetics. It surely can't be the same for everyone. So he lost ALL of his friends or just the important one's? Like I said, rough, rough age!!


I found my post and my apologies to the Moderators and Administration of Braintalk!!_ _ _ _ _

Oh, thank you very much for the photo's!! It's always nice to get a personal glimpse into someone's life!! I really shouldn't wish to hard. We had "someone" try and take over a forum and I do mean take over!!....and run it in a 12 step gestapo like fashion. Everyone left, including "this person"!! I should have spoken up but I didn't:(

No one own's a forum and no one dictates how a forum is run. It was awful...and I watched the underhanded scheming from the very beginning!! This place is very tame and I am very greatful!!

So you blather huh? I ramble and you blather:):) I go on though because I have no one to talk to. I do but I do not care for meetings. It brings on horrific anxiety and panic. I can tell you that Zoloft is excellent for panic!! I am currently taking Cymbalta. I think cold air is probably better:) I haven't crashed and burned yet though I do walk a fine line. It's better to keep it together!! What's the alternative? Hospital for 2 weeks, being stuffed with drugs then back home to the same sh*t.

Take care and thank you for starting roll call

Love, Phil and Samantha (meow)

Edited to add:

Christine:

This is Jeff. I've known him or years.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=InoSP2oXKfo

[annabel]

I don't have a lot to add except: here:)

[houghchrst]

Phil that's awesome. Is that Jeff doing one of the first ladies in one of the other videos about the v****a monologues?

Use to watch Kids In the Hall late at night all the time. Been a while though. All of son's friends, they had themselves a little clique and he bragged that they had themselves a name almost like a gang because they didn't do drugs like all the other teens. Well I guess he was the only one that was true to it. I told him that there were a lot of kids out there that didn't do drugs and typical for a teen he goes into the I don't like those kids. So as I said we will tread lightly and work through it.

I didn't notice about the marijuana post. There is a Medical Marijuana thread or something to that effect up above. Believe me with my pain levels it is a battle with the choice between natural and chemical and addiction and treating it at all or just living with my pain. Which is pretty much what I do.

Meetings, yeah me neither. Don't do crowds. Panic and anxiety. Self consciousness, drug dealers hanging outside, fakers, making nice. Not my crowd. Not to mention I tend to attract those needy, clingy, dense, complaining type of people. You know the kind that come over at the crack of dawn and drink all your coffee and sit around all day and do nothing but complain about how horrid their life is when their biggest problem is they refuse to do anything to help themselves. The kind that don't get it when you say that you have things to do, places to go, people to see SO PLEASE DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE A** ON THE WAY OUT, type of people.

Most people benefit tremendously from meetings and I absolutely think it is a wonderful idea. Most definitely should be done for those looking to get and remain clean and sober. For a lot of people it becomes a life style. When I worked at the answering service we answered for AA and we would get truck drivers who were in town and looking for a meeting. For them where they bunked depended on where the nearest meeting was. I did it for a while, just wasn't for me. Now let's see if I get slammed for the previous paragraph before they even finish reading the whole post. Bring it on people.

Well now see there, I have done my blathering for this evening. Usually I just peruse and go to bed but felt the need to blather first lol. Thanks for the great video Phil. Nice to "meet" one of your friends.

Hey there Annabel good to see you are here.


{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

[Phil]

(Edited to add: Hello annabel!!:):) )



Why you, talking about people like that!!

I'm kidding I'm kidding. I'm only kidding!! I know exactly what you mean. I haven't watched the v****a monologues all the way through to know if he is in it or not....I actually found the beginning boring so I just stopped watching it.

Jeff actually sews his own dresses. One time he got so disgusted he actually threw the sewing machine down the stairs!!:)

I've heard though that the v****a monologues are actually quite funny. Didn't Lilly Tomlin do or actually start the VM? If you like Kids in the hall they are on youtube. EVERYTHING is on you tube, even Gilligans Island and EVEN video's about weather sirens!!

Speaking of pain, I am in PAIN and on the patch...and it is NOT working!! I'm really hoping and praying when you get in, you get a good Doctor and get on something appropriate. Now they can jump me for talking about drugs on an Addiction forum!!

I have a question. Maybe your son know's the answer. Where are all of these kids getting all of these drugs? Are their parents that dumb about their prescription medication? 15 year olds don't get prescriptions for pain medication.

The most truthful thing ever told to me and it was so hard to accept (this was after detox): You cannot keep the same "old" drug using, pot smoking, drinking friends OR, you'll get pulled right back in. If your son is to remain drug free then he needs to ditch those losers. If their using drugs then their probably drinking and smoking pot too!!

I know how hard it must be for him. I wouldn't drink a beer or smoke pot right now for a million dollars. For one, I'd throw up and be paranoid but in the long run it just might "activate" those old behaviors.....it's just not worth it!!

I have documented back injuries (I don't have the report in front of me) and possible statin injury so yes, I do take "medication". I am very fortunate that none of it was ever my drug of choice and I do not get high off of it. One is the patch and the other is a med for breakthrough pain. Other than that, that's all I'll say, here on this forum.

We should not be ignored and denied because of our previous mistakes. I kept log books forever but the Doctor never wanted to see them.

Meetings: My favorite was when we split up into groups of 5 or 6. That was perfect for me. When they put me in a room full of 40 people? I just flipped!!

Talk to you soon.....

Love, Phil and Samantha (meow)