Where is Everyone?

[Bdix30]

Ive seen a few posts from about half of our board here and there but nothing on a regular basis. Where is everyone? I miss you guys. :(

[Mari]

Hi,
Check your PMs
Mari:)

[waves]

i am here. i am not online much because i have moved and my situation does not permit it, but i will be around here every few days.

i am quite distressed about the whole forum secession. i have seen BrainTalk grow over 10 years, from when it was called "A Window On My Mind" poetry forum for those with neurological disorders. it was a support forum then too.

with the downtime i read a lot of judgements posted here and elsewhere and... frankly... i thought, unduly so. If we are to give credit where credit is due.

Bobi I hope you are well, and the children. Wasn't it you got me into cheese right when i was trying to eat veggies! :D it was comfy tho.

I have just moved and that has been tumultuous along with other changes in my life. But I am rolling with the tides and the seas aren't too rough right now.

Mari, I like your avatar. I hope to see you around here.

~ waves ~ from across the ocean

[AncientWolf]

Honestly, I'd love to participate in this forum more. I participate in other forums on BT quite frequently. The trouble is that in this particular forum I alienated some people because of some disagreements we had at the beginning and I feel less and less welcome here every time I post. Maybe that's part of the Bi-Polar....it probably is....but there is some truth to it. Some don't like me because they disagree with some of my most strongly held opinions, some don't like me because I am very vocal in my opinions and have probably stepped on some toes. I just wish we could have a blank slate. I am willing to move on and be just another member of the forum, but I don't know how the rest of you feel about me or if you'd even care one way or the other whether or not I post anymore.

I would love to have a place where I can discuss the issues that affect me as a bipolar individual. I know I will probably never be really loved and accepted here by most, but it'd be nice if I could just make a few friends and not make any enemies. I've already apologized over and over for everything I did wrong here, I just hope we can all move on.

On a less personal note, it's likely a lot of people haven't even discovered BT is back or decided not to migrate back from BT2. I do see activity in many of the forums and it is slowly growing again. I have full confidence that BT will once again become a pretty active place. It will change and grow over the years, but I think it will always be a place I love.

Peace,

Daniel

[waves]

Hi Daniel,

I don't know whom you feel you alienated, but i'd guess there are many many more that you have not. there are a lottt of members who don't post on a regular basis, but drop in for periods of time... i understand feeling uneasy - i have also felt similarly in my own situations, but try to tip-toe past, and....

post to your heart's content!!!

hopefully other members will gradually return as braintalk returns.

but have you noticed that, when someone else pops up here, they seem to receive an invitation, or at least the information and link to the new forum. i have some unhappy thoughts about this which i will save for another post.

Anyway Daniel, just wanted to say you have my support here.

~ waves ~ from across the ocean

[AncientWolf]

Hi Daniel,

I don't know whom you feel you alienated, but i'd guess there are many many more that you have not. there are a lottt of members who don't post on a regular basis, but drop in for periods of time... i understand feeling uneasy - i have also felt similarly in my own situations, but try to tip-toe past, and....

post to your heart's content!!!

hopefully other members will gradually return as braintalk returns.

but have you noticed that, when someone else pops up here, they seem to receive an invitation, or at least the information and link to the new forum. i have some unhappy thoughts about this which i will save for another post.

Anyway Daniel, just wanted to say you have my support here.

~ waves ~ from across the ocean


Thanks waves, I appreciate it. As for the "other" forum, it was neat to see it was there when this one was down for a while, but it never really felt the same. I can understand if folks made new friends and connections there and want to keep posting, but I wish they wouldn't try to take away from Braintalk itself. As for me, I'm gonna stick to Braintalk. It's been my home for a while now and I've come to think of many of you as friends and even family. I can understand getting hooked on a new forum sometimes, but no matter how many forums I post to, I'll always post at Braintalk as long as it's here.


Peace,

Daniel

[Bdix30]

Waves :) :)

Its been quite awhile!! (felt like a crack addiction when the forums were down lol) How are you? Yep Im guilty for the cheese and crackers lol. In fact, Im eating some right now. (and some peanut butter and celery lol)

Its good to see some familiar names :)
Bobi

[waves]

You corruptress you! Oh I hear you tho... last night i had a chunk o' this stuff called "Pecorino sardo" - Sardenian Pecorino cheese. i started out with some wheat bread too but i ended up getting another chunk and just nibbling on the cheese like a mouse! :D

Here it's like they put these different cheeses before me after every dinner almost... it's customary here, but man, i'm trying to lose Zyprexa weight, grrrrrrr!!!!

The move was a physical and mental strain bigtime. I was having trouble in a relationship then and, independently, going through a period of inner.... perplexity? can't think of a better word. Some days i stayed in bed. other days i managed to hall a$$ even if it hurt a lot, or do a little and allow myself to rest..... in the end, here i am, i made it.

now i am still adjusting. not having my own room is hard. i had one even as a child. i am used to a lot of alone time, and apart time, and here it is hard to get that. even outside it would be. but even going outdoors is a hurdle for me.

So catch me up a bit on you? Last I recall you were going through battles for your kid's education program at the school - and giving them a good whack if i recall... how are they? how've you been moodwise?

it really is nice to see you again. :)

~ waves ~

[waves]

Yes, I appreciated the temp forum as just that. It was also very clearly so at first... and then there seemed to be a turn of the tides so to speak. Followed by what I have called, in other posts, a secession. The thing that bugs me most about the invitations is that i had been reading the community cuidelines over at Neurotalk and found that basically, there i cannot link to BrainTalk in my posts (as i read it):

Inappropriate Content
...
Specifically prohibited from our community:
...
* Soliciting others to join another online mental health community
...

For links to other websites, the following guidelines apply:
...
* Links on a post to anything except another mental health community are okay, as long as it's your personal site, photos, a research article, a helpful tip, etc....
...So from here one can link there, but not viceversa.

I was in a bad way when i found this forum down... and when it stayed down I was disappointed at the lack of administrative communication. Angry and suspicious at times. But in the end it came down to judgement and really i didn't feel i had neither the information nor the right to judge JL or other members of he administration. I mean nobody's twisting my arm to post here.

And stuff happens. I think a lot of negative factors coincided to cause the long downtime... and things that could happen to anybody. Life's real difficulties. Difficult realities.

Well, that is what I chalk things up to, and its others' right to do so differently.

peace :)

~ waves ~ of two forums
~

[AncientWolf]

Well I, for one, am glad you returned to us waves. You seem like a really cool person.

It really sucked to not have braintalk for so long. For me it was even longer because my old computer started freezing up when coming to Braintalk or similar type forums. When I got my new computer I was excited to be able to get back to Braintalk only to find the message on the site that he was upgrading and would be back in a few days......then a week or so later it was gone altogether. I have missed this place a lot and am glad it's back. JL does such a wonderful job keeping this place going but, it's bound to have problems now and then. I appreciate him and the mods quite a bit.

We continue to grow back towards a strong, active, caring community and I believe we will continue on doing so. I'm sad for the loss of dear friends who abandoned this place, but I am excited for the ones who have returned and the ones who aren't my friends yet but will be. I wish all the best.

Peace,

Daniel

[Bdix30]

I LOVE Sardenian Pecorino cheese!!!! Its a speciality cheese here though so its expensive as all get out, but I always add it to the holiday platters I make. GOOOOD stuff!!!

The battle for my kids education will be never ending I'm afraid - however I enrolled them both in a new charter school here and my bipolar son emotionally is doing better tenfold. He's got 3 really nice close friends and his self esteem has gone up a lot. He still struggles with a classroom enviroment, but is passing and doing ok. I'm proud of him. They are kind and considerate of his limits at this school - which honestly at this point, is more important then the accademic excellence. (We do that at home, and his ISAT scores were in the 97% so he gets it, just isnt programed to sit and do book learning) My younger son is excelling at this school both emotionally and academicly. Its a good fit. They use what is called the "Harbor Method" which is working great.

Me? I took a job with Health and Welfare for the mental health division. Im in charge of community education, support groups, and sitting on the children's mental health counsel. Its about 95% at home and 5% in the office so I make my hours and can work in my PJs lol. Im enjoying it alot. And if I wake up and feel as though I can't mentally extinguish myself that day - no one yells and threatens to fire me. :)

I've been married 10 years and STILL have problems sharing a room lol. I like my space. I have a reading chair and bookshelf in our room, and I finally went and bought one of those chinese room divider things that look like a folded up fan, and put it between my chair and the bed so I'd at least have my own "area" in our room. I'm glad you made it through and on top!! Last year was a rough year for you.

Too bad your not closer. I'd ask you to come over for a plate of cheese, homemade scones and coffee!!

Its so good hearing from you.

Daniel - how are you? Last time I heard from you you were having issues with the seisures when you would sit at the computer. Have they improved?

Bobi

[AncientWolf]

Daniel - how are you? Last time I heard from you you were having issues with the seisures when you would sit at the computer. Have they improved?

Bobi

Bobi, thanks for asking. :) I think the problems I was having sitting at the computer were probably just a combination of other factors (lack of sleep, stress, med changes, etc) that conspired to make *anything* I did difficult. I still have a problem with some websites and their flashing advertisments, but I can usually turn away from those quickly enough.

I still have seizures, but I am learning more to live with them as well as what triggers them so I can avoid having as many as possible.

How have you been?

Peace,

Daniel

[highhatsize]

Dear Bobi,

I haven't been posting much, but those posts that I have written I have posted on the "other" site.

I think that it is a shame that the "old" Braintalk community is now divided and would prefer that all was as before, but that is not going to happen.

The most recent hiatus in the old Braintalk was egregiously long. I am in good shape, but were I in crisis and relying on that site as a lifeline, it would have been intolerable.

After two relatively closely spaced crashes, I have switched to the "other" site because it has, at least, not shown itself to be un-reliable.

I have nothing but praise for the effort that John Lester put forward over the years to create and maintain the old Braintalk, but time, and interest, changes. That is what appears to have happened.

Lastly, this isn't an emotionally charged issue for me. It is purely pragmatic.

- highhatsize

[Bdix30]

Hey HHS :) Great to hear from you!

I've been posting at both sites, and yes this split has me sad as well. :( I'm glad to hear you are in good shape though! What's been keeping you busy? :)

Bobi

[highhatsize]

Dear Bobi,

I had been engaged for over a year in an attempt to segue from high-dose Paxil to Cymbalta. During the same time, I gradually introduced lamictal and wellbutrin, as well, as substitutes.

I really wanted to switch to Cymbalta, which had been represented to me as more effective than Paxil and with fewer side effects. Unfortunately, the lamictal was ineffective; the wellbutrin caused me to lose my propriocentric sense; and, at the high levels that I needed to take Cymbalta to make it effective, the side-effects were worse than Paxil.

So, I retreated to the status quo antes regimen and am considering trying a newer SSRI, (like lexapro), instead of a new family of drugs, (like Cymbalta, a SSRI/SNR).

I feel "blah", but OK, and still hopeful. What I dislike about SSRIs is that they make me feel disconnected emotionally from my fellow species members. In the final analysis, feeling disconnected and blunted emotionally is a lot better than feeling profoundly depressed.

Hope your life has taken off like a 747 during the hiatus.

Glad to hear from you,
- highhatsize