neighbor

[joy]

The neighbor that I spoke about in my earlier post passed away this morning. Even with alzheimers he had those days when he was a smiling, jolly person.

A man still in the war, flying his airplane. Both the man and woman were in the service, met and married. I had already noticed a long time ago that they had taken care of some details, for instance their tomb stone is already in place so I'm sure they already have the funeral details worked out and have taken care of other details.

After my husband's cousin died (he was just one year older than hubby) it made my interest in getting things like this settled. Then he broke his ankle and we still have not visited the funeral home to start the process. This just is a reminder to myself that we should get in gear and do as much of this type decision making things together now.

While at the hospital, both times, husband was asked about a living will. It shook me up of course because I have been the one for both my parents. The first, there was not one for my dad. Then I made myself ask mother and we had one in place for her. It didn't matter, they still came back to me asking variuos things. I know how hard it is even when you think you are prepared. And you are never truly prepared I don't think. But at least if you had discussed things when your loved ones were in a better frame of mind, it has to help just a bit.

[Jo6]

joy, I am so sorry about your neighbor. It is bad he had to go through the last few days of his life in such a manner.

I also have found out some things lately that has made hubby and I rethink our wills as well as our Living Will. Afte MIL broke a hip, had a stroke the Dr. was going to ignor the living will no matter what it said. Hubby had to tell them, AGAIN, no feeding tube.

these things are really heart breaking for him to have to keep saying this over and over.

It is good the son was preparing a home for the wife/mom. She has had a lot to go thru, hasn't she. I hurt for her, the family and also for you, Joy. you have been there for them and neighbors sometime begen to feel like family. I am thankful they had you. You take care too, Joy. I know your heart is hurting for all of them.
take care and be in touch, Jo

[Tootsie]

When you read in the newspapers, all these stories about family conflicts, over end of life medical decisions, for an impaired member, it should make everyone make recognize, that they must have things in order, and LEGALLY enforceable.

I think I have posted before, about being asked by the orthopedic surgeon who repaired my mother's broken hip, about her wishes. HE was being pressured by operating room staff, to keep a specific IV line open for resuscitation. There are some people, including some medical professionals, that truly believe, that all possible measures should be taken to prolong life.

It is unfortunate, but sometimes you do need to keep saying the same thing over and over and over again. My mother told everyone she met, "Don't let them do that to me again!" She had been successfully resuscitated once, and then had to live through burying her second husband, and Alzheimer's Disease. Cheerio.