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View Full Version : read this just might make you think


Kashis
09-17-2007, 10:22 AM
Tonight I suffer because of you
only thing is I am not black and blue
the pain lingers but do you remember why you kicked my butt
that november march or december
do you think it made a difference did it make a change
do you even recall why you beat me that day

I relive your moments even years after
you took away my right to laughter I have a disease a disorder
cause you decided to be the law and inflict the things that play in my mind
like a recorder I sit tonight and I am in pain I have to suffer cause of you again no you didn't touch me in a real long time but you left so much damage and left me blind

I may have gotten over it I may forgive but your mistake was letting me live I am building my life I am coming back thanks to your maliscious attack I will never again give you that crack you won't cut me down you won't pull my hair you won't even flip me off that chair '
your pain is here forever I won't let you win I won't let you hurt me ever again my heart is healed but my body is broke youare such a fricken joke

I can't ask why even though I want to know you don't have an answer and if you did it wouldn't fly you weren't strong enough to help me die I am alive and walking talll and some of you have to copewith me now some of you don't and some don't remember even if I really did anything wrong back on that day in may march or september I will fight my pain the torcher inside I will really never get over the pain you sent thats pretty much now how my days are spent but I am growing with hi self esteem what you did was truely mean I won't accept Im sorry or I can't fix this either your answers are null and void I am a suvivor for those that will hold me and listen to me cry and for those abusers who got fixed and tried you still have to suffer just as me as I will throw it back at you so natrually cause it is you who put me here you took away my life and career you took away life as i knew it why the hell did you put me through it did you realize the pain when you got through with it


no you didn't didn't phase you you were drunk you stupid fool I have to suffer more each day just because things weren't going your way you proved your point and now its over but you fricken jerk I still suffer I want you so to feel this pain night after night again and again now you love me so differently but I still have this anger in me I just can't get over it just can't let it go it hurts every fricken day you know you took away pieces that made you love me my singing my laughter my sociablity now I go nowhere don't do a thing I sit in the house and still wear your ring
You had no right to take things away they belong to me my voce my heart the music inside I can't no longer go for a ride I killed noone and yet have been sentenced to my life being battered and dented what you inflicted on me did affect others my children and me as a mother take a pill it won't hurt but it is you who put me here you fricken jerk K
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Kashis
09-21-2007, 01:34 AM
I posted this because there came a time I found out I had a complicated brain injurie from all the abuse and this is what I needed to do to cope I hope it can help someone else too Krissi

Cry Tears
10-01-2007, 07:18 PM
Oh Krissi...hugs...hugs to the darling little girl deep down inside you!
You didn't deserve to have an evil monster for a "mother"...I'm sorry you did.
May God heal your soul...she did NOT kill that!...she tried...
but instead she killed her own soul.
She will have to answer for the pain and suffering she inflicted on you.
There is a God...and He will one day, make the wrongs, right!

Then YOU will be completly healed...
And your healing will last forever!
and she'll be the one begging for mercy!
She'll be wishing it was just fist and kicks, even ugly words...
hers will be far, far worse...and will last forever!

Hugs, cheryl

houghchrst
10-02-2007, 10:08 AM
By the ring on your finger comment I am assuming it was spousal abuse. A horrible thing for a "human" to inflict such injury on another. You may feel broken but I am glad that you are overcoming and you will be an inspiration to others who are in a bad situation and should get out. Keep moving forward and healing emotionally.

(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))

Kashis
10-04-2007, 02:39 PM
I have to reply as my abuse was from my mother stepfather both brother inlaws and my husband i grew up thinking this was normal till I broke the cycle my mother still mentally abuses me but I have a choice not to allow it and I don't anymore and yes she now suffers as she can't talk to me because she is terrified it may hurt me as I confronted her

I now have brain damage she blames my husband only claims she had no part but I know better and my sis does the same but I have moved on if I didn't forgive I would be lettin them all still win I have a complicated brain injury now and the docs can't even put a time frame on it I got my husband the help he needs 1 yr worth before I took him back and he was the one who tolld me he needed help so I agreed but I don't suggest this to anyone who isn't sure that its for real I was nervous but he couldn't see me for 3 months till he graduated his first treatment class but none of my family members thought they had a problem so at least I can say he steped up

I am glad the poem hit hearts though as it is reality of the life of an abused person but as I always say I am no longer a victum I am a survior it stopped now I am pretty sure 9 yrs since abuse

what scared him was if I didn't press charges it was attempted murder in the 2nd and he was at the hosp with me the doc took him out of the room and told him one more blow to the head you would have killed her I think this made the biggest difference


Please don't ever stay with an abuser I got lucky he admited a disease admited he needed help and got it on his own I didn't make him this was something he felt he had to do