do you think we are blessing to others?

[Mark N]

I was writing to one of many people that have responded to my wife post and got thinking about another post. How are we a blessing to the people around us? No I am not saying our affliction is given to us by God or that it was a good thing for any of us but I am saying we can show people things that many of them close their eyes to important things. So how do you think we bless the people around us? No we aren't saints or even nice to be around sometimes as we are in pain and don't feel good but we do have something to offer them.

I see us as a blessing because as we lose many of the things we used to have it strips away all the BS surrounding our lives and we see more clearly what is really important in our lives. Our spouses and families could see it more clearly through us without going through all we do.

They are blessed by our intensity of our love for them because we know how close we are to losing them. While other lovers tire of each other we are intense about our love because we know how fragile it is and can be gone from us in an instant.

What do you say, how are we blessings in the life of those around us if they would just open their eyes and see what we can show them?

PS I wrote this because of the blessings I see you as in my life, thanks for opening my eyes.

[GardeniaGirl]

as we lose many of the things we used to have it strips away all the BS surrounding our lives and we see more clearly what is really important in our lives. Our spouses and families could see it more clearly through us without going through all we do.

They are blessed by our intensity of our love for them because we know how close we are to losing them. While other lovers tire of each other we are intense about our love because we know how fragile it is and can be gone from us in an instant. .

I really agree with this and this is the point I have arrived at with regard to my own health problems.....it is helping me to strip away all that is meaningless in life and focus on the only thing that really matters - our love and connection to others.

I am not in an intimate relationship at this time, but I try to apply this line of thinking to my other relationships- I try to focus on what is most important and then give that to others (although I will admit I frequently fall short of the mark I am aiming for).

I think that listening to someone, giving them love, compassion, empathy, understanding, and forgiveness - that is really the only thing that will matter in the end.

I can see how these things get buried under the day to day demands we all face and get caught up in. But deep down, I do think they are the things that will matter the most to most of us when we reach the end of our lives.

The Buddhists have a meditation exercise they use which ties into this - close your eyes and visualize yourself laying on your death bed. Look back over your life and reflect on what was important, what mattered to you, what was meaningful. Do this for an extended period of time, not just in a cursory manner. then, after you have identified those things, examine your current life and reflect on whether or not the things you are doing and the ways you spend your time are in line with the things that matter most to you. Use this insight to make alterations to your behavior in the future, so that when you do reach the end, you will have lived in a way that is truly meaningful for you.

I have done this meditation several times and find that it always clarifies for me what matters most.

I am not sure if i am really answering your question - but at least these are some ideas that are related.

I think its a good topic of discussion (I love deep philosophical conversations).

[Peter B]

Mark,
Interesting topic. I'm really not sure if I understand you. While what I've been thru certainly has opened my eyes quite a bit, I'm not so sure that I would characterize the way I've changed as a blessing to others.

It is clear that my priorities have clarified and I hope that my added insight has, in one way or the other, manifested itself in a manner that rubs off me and onto my children.

I almost feel that I have the advantage now with most people because I "get it" while so many others don't. The fact that nobody can hurt me in any way is empowering. Confidence in the person I am makes me feel 10 feet tall.

Perhaps in ways that are too subtle for me to realize I HAVE made a positive impact on others. By others I mean my 2 children. Those are the only people I WANT to have an impact on.

Mark, I'm typing a knee-jerk response to your query and as I sit here I am tossing the subject around. I should probably have waited before responding. It certainly is thought provoking. Thank you for the momentary diversion.

Pain free days,
Pete

[Mark N]

Pete there is no one way to answer this, I am just trying to put our lives in a different light. We all know how much we have lost and how our condition damages our relationships and ourselves but forget about the good it brings to others. your children are an example of how they benefit from your condition. I know my children are more understanding of other disabled people. they view the disabled as real people not a person that is different, to me that is a blessing to others. I know my children have become appreciative of the things I do for them because they know how painful it is for me to do anything.

I think we are a blessing to others because we are more understanding of what they go through in their lives because we know what we go through and how it changes us.

GG, you are seeing some of the blessings we receive and I hope you see that others around you benefit from your understanding of the important things in life. How our willingness to listen to others blesses their lives. The Buddhist meditation is an interesting one and something I hadn't heard of, thanks for bringing it up.

Okay everyone else, how do you bless other people's lives {because you really do}?

[BrokenBladder]

Mark this is a great topic.
I do feel like I'm a blessing to others inpart because I see life so much more clearly since my disability. I'm grateful for the small things in life and take extra time with my current friends and I'm always willing to take someone else under my wing.
Before I got sick I was caught up in the hussle of the world,just like most other people. Once my illness took over my life I began to see how important life, love, intamacy, and true friendship.
I hope this post makes sense as it has been a rough day.

[simby]

i have become even more empathetic towards others.

As for the back thing and the limits it puts on me, i don't know if that has been a blessing to anyone.
It mostly just weeded out the fair-weathered friends.
Interestingly enough, that left me with noone in this state and only 2 really really close friends in the next state over.

Good discussion. Thank you for your thought provoking q's


sims

[Mark N]

Lisa, you are right about valuing love, intimacy, and true friendship. I think we do focus on the small things more now.

Simby, no I understand our condition isn't a blessing to anyone but the people we have become I think is a blessing. Just as you pointed out others benefit from you becoming more empathic for them as a result of your painful condition.

Another way I have become better is to be more patient with others. Yes there are many times my pain makes me want to get things over with but I am more understanding of it taking someone longer to get the point or accomplishing a task.

I know we don't see ourselves as a blessing but think about it and you will see you have become better about something in your life.

[JAVISI]

Mark,
I like the question. Since not being able to work as a nurse I have struggled with what I am supposed to do to carry on. I know that I was put on earth to help others. Before I became sicker I would go to each and every thread and post to people that have gotten no resonse. Even if I didn't have an answer for them I wanted everyone that comes to this site that they at least come here and at least be heard, Their feelings validated. When I gain my strength I will begin to do that again.

I have been blessed by so many people on this website. I have more friends now than I ever have!

My best friend had a talk with me when she was here from Texas and she asked me a pivitol question, " If I was to die in a year would I be happy with living the life I was?" The answer was a simple "NO"! I was always afraid to leave my abusive ex. My life is a million times better since leaving.

I have always beleived in how important family is but I definatly cherish my time with them more. I have been blessed to have the time to spend with them, before I threw myself into worl and as others have said the daily routines or ruts we get into.

I know watch the sunset and rise and realize how we forget to see the beauty in the everyday things. My appriciation for the small things. I try to take the time to smile at others espesdially when I can see they are struggling. Even the smallest gestures can impact others more than we will ever know.

Just some of my thoughts! Dreaming Big and Reaching for the Stars, Javisi;)

[debhun]

I don't know I will have to think on this one.

[suede]

Mark,

I believe I understand the point of your question and I don't think I could have answered it before all that has happened this past week.

I intend to respond to this but need time to put my thoughts together as I am still very emotional and want to answer honestly.

This question has given me even more food for thought on a already over filled brain.

Linda

[Kathi49]

Mark,

I think I have been a blessing to others. I don't know...you would have to ask my friends and family. :) Personally, I am far more appreciative of the small things than I was in the past. And to me, family and friends is what matters in the long run.

[Mark N]

I decided to put this question up because too many times we get blamed for our condition. Too many people question us about our condition, if we do something normal they think we are fine and not disabled. So my point about this was to say something positive about us and to realize we still do something positive in our world.

Another way we are a blessing [or whatever word you want to use] is we are people that our conditions challenges medicine to find a way to treat our condition so others benefit from our experience.

Like the TV commercial about paying forward a good deed we can show others kindness even with our disability and show others how to treat others in a good way.

We are an example that you don't cease being a person jut because you become disabled.

Come on and don't be afraid to say something good about the bad situation we are in.:D

[Kathi49]

Mark,

Are you asking us to brag about ourselves? :) Just kidding.

I don't recall ever being blamed for my conditions though. No one has ever said "...it is your own fault because of...x,y or z". For people that are or were really interested, I just explain. For any others I just let them guess LOL! :) They can speculate all they want to...if they want to know, they can ask and I will explain...again. But in all seriousness I have never felt I have been blamed or at least no one has ever said anything to me in a blaming way.

Now, it has been said to me, "...but you were fine yesterday!" So, I would just explain how the darn stuff hits and comes on out of the blue. I did have a "go round" with my mom once and only because she didn't understand all of it fully. So, I printed off that one article about what it is like living with CP. And she ended up crying...she really just didn't understand it all. But since then she always asks if I am able or up to doing something on any given day.

And another thing. I am not too proud to ask for help when I need it. I HATE and DETEST the fact that I have to because I just don't want to burden anyone. But there are times I just have to have someone with me...especially for a cervical injection. And 9 times out of 10 my mom, my husband or my sister will gladly go with me. I have just learned that there are occasions when I just can't go it alone and need a little help.

Also, bless my daughter's heart yesterday. I had told her that earlier in the day I had fallen...you know the story. :eek: So, I had all this STUFF in my living room for the yard sale this weekend. All day long, off and on, I took out small items to the garage and left the larger things for my husband. But when my daughter came home she said, "Mom! Do not lift ANYTHING!" And that girl kicked some butt lol! She spent about an hour or so getting the heavier items to the garage. Needless to say, my husband was impressed and thanked her. Also, my sister and is taking Saturday off to help me out with it as I have helped her in the past. Really, she is the one that will come running when things are bad. BUT...that's because she went through a period in her life well, where just about everyone turned their back on her. I didn't. And she remembers that. It's not like I ever expect to be paid back at all and I mean emotionally. But she is always saying...without you I never would have made it. I actually helped her to get into a position where she could leave her abusive husband. That was over 20 years ago...but she hasn't forgotten. :)

So, I guess my point is...I am thankful and feel blessed that friends and family are willing to help ME! And I do things to help them when I can....just small things....like doing my niece's wedding invitations for her. She was thrilled about that. And it was something I could do without too much strain. So, I guess I was a blessing to her in a way because she said I saved her a lot of money by doing them myself. I did order the paper/envelopes and it was expensive...but then printed them myself. So, as I told her, that's my wedding gift to you LOL!

And maybe because I have such a large family that we all help each other out. It's like my mom is always saying...there are just times when we all need help. But blamed...no. I just haven't run into that.

And if you referring to our SO's, my husband has never talked to me in a blaming way either. But there was a time he just didn't understand it and thought I could go to work. And, oh, yes, he had plenty to say. But again, he just couldn't "see it" therefore, he didn't understand it. It took a wake up call doctor's appointment for him to get the full picture. I guess he thought if I just took a pill I would get better. But he knows the full story now and if anything he says...don't overdo it!

Sorry for the ramble. :)

[Mark N]

Kathi, I am not saying we are blamed for our condition but do get blame for not being able to do things any more or being able to go places. The old you could go to the store yesterday but can't go shopping with me today. Maybe blame was the wrong word, it is just that we seem to get dumped on for our condition because we are unable to do things we used to do that I thought it would be nice to realize we still contribute in our own way.

Like you, I have a family that understands and helps out when I need the help. it has been hard for me to ask for help too as I always did things for myself in the past but have come to realize that is in the past and not what I can do today. Day to day it just seems like I don't contribute much and I have to remind myself that I still contribute to the people around me.

[suede]

Kathy, I'm tyring to get things ready for a yard sale also, we have just way to much STUFF and because of my condition I find it more a burden than the pleasure I found when we got these things, just to much to take care of.
I don't have a garage to put this stuff in as I price it and get it ready and it is becoming a real chore!!
Sorry just wanted to share that with Kathy.

You know Mark you had to be one of those teachers that keep a students mind active, that's good and I find I need that more now then ever as my mind often goes dormant and needs to be exercised just like "normal" bodies should be.

On to the topic of Marks question!

This has been on my mind since reading the question and I can only come up with this answer.
It seems to me that as with everything it is all about perception, I believe that if we see and feel that we are truly a gift to ourselves and others that we will be perceived as being so, but if we feel bad and useless then others will most likely see us as being so.
I believe that there will always be the odd person that will have a preconceived opinion of us that we may never be able to change their minds but to those people there is usually nothing anyone can do to help them see the good in others, these are the sighted people that are clearly blind to all things in life worth while.

To me I feel as if I have gotten to know many of you all very well here at BT and for the biggest part I have to say that I see most as being very blessed and true to gift to life it's self, one's here that have so much to offer to life that no disability could alter the perception they reflect.

It is the gifted ones that keep me coming back here (hoping it will rub off on me).
Myself I feel I bounce back and forth on this depending on my personal frame of mind on any given day, there are days I feel gifted and that I still have much to offer others and to learn myself and then the days that I truly dread when I feel that I have no true purpose and am only a burden to myself and others. I am however working hard at not allowing those bad days to hang around and bring me down and those around me, kind of like fake it til you make it,

In short it is as I said above, I believe it is about perception and the way we project ourselves to others and feel about ourselves as to rather we are a gift or burden..

I do want to add that it has been the gift of others here that has helped me to see the gift of others in real life with disabilities, understand I have never been cruel or unkind to others with disabilities, I'm ashamed to say though that often my patience would run thin when say getting behind someone in a store with a disability that slowed me down, even though I was not unkind I'm sure the person felt my impatience as I do now when it is me on the receiving end.

I know this is rather off topic but I wanted to add that as my pain became worse and I was still working waiting tables it was like my station at work became the selected section for any person with a disability no matter what, as I became more aware of what life was like for those disabled I had more patience for others and those that were regulars at the restaurant would ask for my section because they knew I would have the patience for them and not treat them as a burden and one that took up to much of their time and space.

Hope this answers your question, I'm really good about going off in my own direction these days and getting off topic.

Linda

[Mark N]

No Linda, your post was fine and no problem with going off in your direction. As a teacher I was told they wanted me to be the President and also many told me I was the best teacher they have had. I did the best I could and was patient with the students that were slow and unwilling to work until they learned what they could achieve by doing the work. I tried not to give them too much homework because I understood other teachers were also giving them homework and many of them had practice or work in the evening. I gave them time in class to get the work done if they applied themselves. If they were not doing work then they had more work in the evening or getting a lower grade. I would give them one other chance to complete their work.

You are right about the way we perceive ourselves and others. That is one of the big problems with my wife is she misperceives what is said and what was meant. I try to explain things to her and she denies what I meant. She does very, very little to care for me and thinks doing one shopping trip once a week and sweeping the upstairs is taking care of me. I guess me cleaning the basement we are living in and cleaning two cat pans doesn't count along with fixing dinner for the family along with keeping things fixed in the house and disciplining my son.

If others had to go through what we do they would be more understanding of what our lives are like.

[Kathi49]

Linda,

I completely understand. :) This is the first yard sale I have ever had. But I am doing the gathering of the STUFF in stages LOL! I did buy some of those price sticker dealies and a couple of yard signs and stakes and also advertised. My husband managed to get all the boxes out for me and I just went through them and priced as I went. It is a chore. But I really wanted to do this mainly to get rid of the STUFF! A lot of it is decorations, books, collectibles...you name it...I used to decorate big time around the holidays. I just can't do it anymore...so I am downsizing LOL! :) And this is all about the time my daughter is getting ready to move. So, my old stuff combined with her old stuff made it a good time to get rid of it all! Plus, I told her we would split any monies we made. It would help us both out a little. I can put any monies towards Christmas and she could use a little to start off on her apartment. And see...we are dreaming big LOL! And if the rest of it doesn't sell...off to the Goodwill or Amvets or something. I am NOT re-storing any of it! I wish you success with yours as well! :) Are you having yours this weekend too? I think it is kind of fun actually and at least I will have some help. And, I told my daughter I want 100% committment over the weekend! :) Oh, and my husband through in some awesome NASCAR, and St. Louis Cardinals collectibles and I hope they sell well. He has TONS of that stuff...I wish he would get rid of most of it LOL! You would die if you were to see his supposed office upstairs. I am tired of looking at Jeff Gordon and Tony Stewart stuff LOL! But as he says, the majority of it will go to his son. And I have NO problem with that at all! :)

Sorry Mark...back to your thread.

Two thoughts came to mind. I know you were a teacher. But, just a thought, does your wife ever feel resentment because she feels like you are trying to still "teach"? Just curious and I don't mean it in a bad light. I will just say that my ex mother-in-law was a teacher and I swear to you she thought she had to teach the whole world. She was a very nice lady and very smart. But it really drove me bonkers! Heck, it drove her much older children nuts! What I would laugh at is that her husband, my ex father in law, would say he wished she would just shut up and he was a pyschiatrist LOL! For him to say that...I even knew he thought she was making mountains out of molehills. He KNEW she meant well...but she did go overboard! And I remember one of the much, much older spouses just telling her off one day. I think she made us all mental sometimes LOL! I just wonder if your wife feels a bit of resentment when you do try to explain things.

Okay, as for men. Sorry guys. I know you want affirmation and thanks for all that you do do. But I THINK we women just view it as working together to help out. I am just saying this because my husband will let me know that he vaccumed. But it isn't like just saying he took care of it. He really wants praise LOL! And I DO thank him. But we women are soooo darn used to doing most everything in the house that sometimes we don't really stop to say thank you...I know I don't...not always. And he doesn't always thank me either for doing laundry, cooking, etc. I've always kind of viewed as give and take and helping out...NOT keeping score. I had a first husband like that and it was ALWAYS tit for tat and I hated it! I refuse to live that keeping score thing again. So, I guess we both just go about life and whatever needs to get done gets done. But he does want it known how much he has helped out. Shoot, I ought to make a list of all I do but I don't. But, you are right...just a thank you goes a long way. And as you already know...it is not always 50/50. Sometimes, it is 90/10 with me being just the 10%. It just all depends.

[Peter B]

Mark,
I think the reason I, as well as others, have a hard time answering the question is because MOST people find it difficult to praise themselves for ANY reason. It requires you to throw humility out the window. Not an easy thing to do. Well, it isn't so easy for me.

I can only hope that my children have benefited in some way, due to my conditions(s). I'm sure that they both have developed a deeper understanding of disabled people as far as the fact that disabilities notwithstanding, we are the same.

Pain free days,
Pete

[Mark N]

Pete, no need to throw humility out the window just telling ourselves that we aren't worthless. It really is a bit of cognitive behavior modification as we focus on what we can't do and life becomes more difficult than it needs to be. If we tell ourselves positive things we can start to feel better about our situation. As the old saying goes 'it ain't braggin if you can do it'.

Kathi, no I try not to teach people unless they ask me to teach them something. Even with my son, I ask if he wants me to coach him or just play for fun. Now I do think things through and I am very detailed about my positions and that does bug her at times. I have little down time from learning because I love it. One thing I do that is bad is to keep bringing things up until a solution is arrived at and I have had to work hard to stop. I really work at making my point and then stopping and not going any further because I was bad about that. I act as a teacher to my wife or kids but I do repeat myself at times. I can be maddening at times but I try to limit those times as much as I can LOL.

The point about doing housework is much like your's Kathi, there are just things in life that need to be done that need to be shared. Shared not 50/50 but based on what you are best at and who has the time to do it. I have been willing to wash clothes but my wife won't let me saying I would ruin too many clothes so I mowed the yard because she didn't want to do that chore. I took over cooking to eliminate a chore for her. I agree with you Kathi it isn't a scorecard thing for us to add up what we do or the other one does it is just something we do.

[curiousforever]

I don't know. I guess. I've realized last night that the boys (7, 8, almost 10 --my 16 yr old..he isn't in the 'the boys' saying) have become daddy's boys. They used to be mine. I know it's what they do - I remember going thru this with my oldest also. Doesn't make it any easier.

But it makes me feel rejected cause I'm not in the best mood at times, or I won't let them have friends over every day instead of them doing what boys' do (gravitate towards dad at about that age). So I've got to kick myself out of that party. They still come to me - and want lovin', but that is different than being mine. Well, at least my hubby can teach them how to be good men.

I still end up making my hubby laugh every day. So, between that and what I can do - I think some days yep...I am at least contributing some.

[houghchrst]

The thought that keeps me going is that maybe things that have happened to me or my illnesses may give me the experience to help someone else. Maybe something I say, advice I give or just a cyber hug will make someone feel better or maybe save a life, or change a bad attitude into a good one. I hope it is all for a reason, whether I actually know of any of the above happening I would hope that it would be so.

[GardeniaGirl]

Based on their actions, my immediate family (mother, father, 2 younger brothers -both in their 30's) doesn't perceive me as any sort of blessing.

My father is the only one of the bunch who has shown actual caring and concern toward me since I started getting sick. I think my health problems cause him a lot of guilt, as he realizes they are from his side of the family, and he just hates to watch me suffer. I haven't been able to give him grandchildren either, so that is a disappointment to him, although he would never criticize me for that. Mainly, my health problems have made him sad. In that case, i am no sort of blessing to him.

My brothers seem to find my problems a major inconvenience to their lives (even though we all live thousands of miles from each other and have for years) and because of that they express anger and rejection of me.

My mother was abusive since I was a baby, so I no longer have contact with her. She is the last person I would ever want to deal with while trying to cope with my health problems.

I have a surrogate aunt who cares about me and had a grandma who cared about me.

In terms of my close friends, my increased empathy and compassion have most likely enhanced those friendships. And those people do care about me and value me, regardless of my health.

[Mark N]

CF and GG, this is the reason I thought of starting this thread. It is very easy in our condition to feel like we aren't contributing anything to our world but the truth is both of you are giving people something they haven't had before. Even if it isn't anything more than the experience of being around someone that is disabled and learning what their life is like. I am sure you contribute even more than that but without you what would your family know about the lives of someone that is disabled. Even the family members that don't react the right way about your disability are learning things about disabled people even when they reject it.

We are more valuable than many of us know. You add an important aspect to our society. One of the big motivations in this is because of the way my wife has treated me over the past few years. If I don't see myself as a valuable member of our society I can't expect anyone else to either. CF & GG I hope you read through these responses and see yourself in some of the blessings because you are a valuable member of our society and don't let anyone tell you different.

[curiousforever]

But it breaks my heart when my youngest wrote in a school paper that what he wishes most for is for me to feel better.

This past school year they were trying to blame my other boy's inability to focus on my health problems - but he has had that problem before I have had mine - this time anyway.

[Mark N]

Bobbi, I am not saying that others aren't a blessing for us. But it doesn't deny that we are still a blessing to those around us. It isn't proximity or anything else it is what we bring to them. My kids see me struggle to do things and still be there for them. They haven't learned by just being around me. I understand with your background it is harder for you to see this but I refuse to be seen as anything but a blessing for what I can still bring to others [it isn't much any more but still important].

CF, I understand how hard it is to have your son write that. But do you stop and think about what you still provide him and his brother with. It is wrong for the school to blame your illness on his problems, you didn't ask to be stricken with this. If nothing else you have been a blessing to me in this deal with my wife. If all I had to go by was her description of me it wouldn't be worth living [I am obstinate enough to keep on living though] any more because the world doesn't need another monster in it - that is only if I go by her perception of me. Get this, she says I am emotionally abusive because she can't get our jokes and I have to tell her I am kidding. Of course it is the only indicator she can use and if she would read them from my perspective she would see plenty of indicators by what she does to me.

Please, believe in yourselves because not many others will. You have worth as a human being and you add something special to society and life because of your disability. I can't make you see it, but I know each of you are a blessing in your own way.

[Bobbi]

I'm sorry. I thought I was responding for myself; I wasn't trying to intimate anything about you, Mark, or your children. Looks like I answered incorrectly, though I'm not sure how my lone response became about you or about my background (which has nothing to do with how I answered). I'm totally lost.

[Mark N]

Bobbi, no need to apologize as I didn't think you were talking about me or my kids. I was just sorry that you seemed not to feel like you bless the world with your presence and what you do. I used my example to give an example of the way we do still have a positive role to play in the world. You brought up good counter ideas that I am sure many are thinking about how can they be a blessing to others in their condition. My current condition just made me very are of how some people treat us like we don't have a positive role in the world and I was hoping others could see the good they still do in our world.

[curiousforever]

CF, I understand how hard it is to have your son write that. But do you stop and think about what you still provide him and his brother with. It is wrong for the school to blame your illness on his problems, you didn't ask to be stricken with this. If nothing else you have been a blessing to me in this deal with my wife. If all I had to go by was her description of me it wouldn't be worth living [I am obstinate enough to keep on living though] any more because the world doesn't need another monster in it - that is only if I go by her perception of me. Get this, she says I am emotionally abusive because she can't get our jokes and I have to tell her I am kidding. Of course it is the only indicator she can use and if she would read them from my perspective she would see plenty of indicators by what she does to me.

Please, believe in yourselves because not many others will. You have worth as a human being and you add something special to society and life because of your disability. I can't make you see it, but I know each of you are a blessing in your own way.

If you have a strange sense of humor - I'd get your jokes!!

I know I am a blessing - I make hubby laugh almost daily over something or another silly I do - being a short blonde - a veritable windfall of jokes :p

[suede]

Bobbi,

I didn't read your response to the thread but think I get the jest of it.

I want to say this no matter what your response though.

You have been a real inspiration to me in more ways then I can tell and know this, in my eyes you are a blessing and if anything I am sorry that you have been inflicted with the illnesses you have.

I don't know you personally or away from this board but from all I have read of your post I can't imagine what more you could do with your life if you had no disabilities, I admire all that you do and how helpful you are to so many.

I hope I am able to make my point with this post as often my words are not what my mind wants.

Just know in my eyes and I'm sure to may others you are a true blessing.

Thank you for being just who you are.

Linda

[Mark N]

Cf, don't know if my jokes are strange enough for you but I do have an odd twist on things at times. But as a short blond you are sure to have had your share of jokes coming your way.