SirTwitchalot
08-04-2007, 06:37 PM
Chronic pain is the cumulative result of the physical onslaught, strain of repetition of my rather painful motor tics. Again the math is simple… The constant bombardment of aggressive motor tics is basically like being physically attacked from all fronts, all the time, by your own self. These motor tics will physical over use, over power, wear/break down your muscular capacity to endure them, leaving entire muscle groups aching, inflamed, swollen, cause bone structure misalignments from constantly throwing bones out of alignment, muscle discomfort, create muscle fatigue, sore joints, and could potentially even tear muscles. When necks tics run rapid, the thrashing, torque, whiplash, force and momentum of them, cause me chronic neck/back problems and pain. I am only 28 years old, however I carry myself like an 80 year old man sometimes, stated bluntly, and it hurts to even move most of the time. I experience weekly/week long migraines, head aches, whiplash, multiply neck popping/cracking (usually for the worse), vertigo, nausea, blurred vision, pinned/contorted/contracting painful neck postures due to prolong bouts of neck tics. Torso jerking has the same “whip lashing” destructive quality also, very hard hip jerks/ back bowing, uncomfortable twisting and pinning wear out my back so much, I can hardly walk, stand, get up, or move. I spend the vast majority of the time lying on the floor, unable to do anything else but have nonstop motor/vocal tics. I sit in a dark lit room that I never leave with out proper warrant, for everyone’s sake.
Within the past 7 years I went from evolving/progressing in the workforce and academic fields, such as teaching middle school level kids photography, tutoring children in the elementary level in the school district (Americorps program), working at restaurant and retail stores, 90% completion of my AA degree, just in the past 2 years I was doing nearly full-time school and full-time work, with plans for degrees at a four year college. I was an active freelance photographer with titles in national shows along with holding one show of my own. I was pursuing photo journalism and feature writing, was an active musician, artist, and engaged in a vast social demographic.
This is a drastic way to explain the slowly progressive then sudden onset of my TS symptoms; however, I shall use it anyway, for it helps shorten the explanation. The difference is much like a person that just has H.I.V. then gets full bloom A.I.D.S. My particular Tourette Syndrome crept up on my in the same manner, slowly it progressed and progressed, then gained in intensity and momentum, a hostile takeover, before I knew it, I could do nothing else but have and be Tourettes. I no longer can readily engage in any of my pursuits or hobbies, I can no longer hold or maneuver a camera, I no longer can sit (this is a mandatory exception) to type or sit still, I eat pacing and standing up, It is now irresponsible of me to enter public settings under some levels of severity that given day or moment, I avoid social groups like the plague, for there is potential of confrontation and misunderstand from others that experience me, it is now negligent and a unnecessary trauma to place myself (when I can anticipate, however, I always anticipate the most for safe measure) into situations that I know will have a multitude of “triggers” escalate my symptoms to severe levels that I can not control (such as going to a grocery store when it is busy, or restaurant, etc), I no longer hang out with friends for any real length of time, I do not go or drive out of town or engage in anything not within a certain criteria for the sake of avoiding my “triggers”. I am so utterly overwhelmed by this I have had to abandon all previous notion of what my life used to be capable of, now with deep regret I must admit my capability is “vice gripped” impaired by these disorders. Any previous possibility or traditional aspiring dream is now greatly inhibited by my inability to even leave my house readily. I can not work or generate any source of income, I can not support myself, I rarely can I sustain or engage in any average human relations, I have nearly lost my ability to interact or function at a physical, mental, personal, and worldly/social level, in regards to the world at large. In truth everything is almost laborious for me to handle or function at any worldly level, being so preoccupied by my disorders.
Within the past 7 years I went from evolving/progressing in the workforce and academic fields, such as teaching middle school level kids photography, tutoring children in the elementary level in the school district (Americorps program), working at restaurant and retail stores, 90% completion of my AA degree, just in the past 2 years I was doing nearly full-time school and full-time work, with plans for degrees at a four year college. I was an active freelance photographer with titles in national shows along with holding one show of my own. I was pursuing photo journalism and feature writing, was an active musician, artist, and engaged in a vast social demographic.
This is a drastic way to explain the slowly progressive then sudden onset of my TS symptoms; however, I shall use it anyway, for it helps shorten the explanation. The difference is much like a person that just has H.I.V. then gets full bloom A.I.D.S. My particular Tourette Syndrome crept up on my in the same manner, slowly it progressed and progressed, then gained in intensity and momentum, a hostile takeover, before I knew it, I could do nothing else but have and be Tourettes. I no longer can readily engage in any of my pursuits or hobbies, I can no longer hold or maneuver a camera, I no longer can sit (this is a mandatory exception) to type or sit still, I eat pacing and standing up, It is now irresponsible of me to enter public settings under some levels of severity that given day or moment, I avoid social groups like the plague, for there is potential of confrontation and misunderstand from others that experience me, it is now negligent and a unnecessary trauma to place myself (when I can anticipate, however, I always anticipate the most for safe measure) into situations that I know will have a multitude of “triggers” escalate my symptoms to severe levels that I can not control (such as going to a grocery store when it is busy, or restaurant, etc), I no longer hang out with friends for any real length of time, I do not go or drive out of town or engage in anything not within a certain criteria for the sake of avoiding my “triggers”. I am so utterly overwhelmed by this I have had to abandon all previous notion of what my life used to be capable of, now with deep regret I must admit my capability is “vice gripped” impaired by these disorders. Any previous possibility or traditional aspiring dream is now greatly inhibited by my inability to even leave my house readily. I can not work or generate any source of income, I can not support myself, I rarely can I sustain or engage in any average human relations, I have nearly lost my ability to interact or function at a physical, mental, personal, and worldly/social level, in regards to the world at large. In truth everything is almost laborious for me to handle or function at any worldly level, being so preoccupied by my disorders.