Why an LBGT forum?

[graymalkin]

This is a place to discuss the ways in which being LGBT affects our neurological conditions, especially how we deal with (and are dealt with by) the medical profession.

Although the purpose of this forum is to provide mutual support and exchange of information among LGBT BrainTalk members, questions and comments from others are welcome as long as respect is maintained.

graymalkin

[AncientWolf]

Good answer gray. I know I'm always hesitant to mention to my doctors that I'm gay. Many doctors immediately have treated me like I'm diseased upon finding out. My current doctor is friendly enough and knows I'm gay, but I still avoid saying anything to any doctor that doesn't need to know. I don't currently have a bf, but when I did I would never say, "my bf described the seizure he saw as...." I would always say, "my 'friend' described the seizure he saw as...." It's a shame I feel like I have to be so secretive, but fact is that many people even in this modern world just don't accept people for who they are and still consider homosexuals as evil people.

Good to see you're back with us gray. You're one of the many folks from here that I've missed.

Peace,

Daniel

[Cutter]

I want to say something here, but there's too much in my head to choose from. :(

[swirlgirl]

I have to say, at first I was reluctant to say I was either at doctor appointments. Now I generally have decided that I won't announce it, but I won't hide it. My current doctor knows, although I have not specifically said it, my partner comes to most of my appointments. And when I went to discuss a surgery, I flat out told the doctor. I wouldn't want the doctor operating on me to be homophobic!!
Otherwise, I find I tend to laugh or giggle when the doctor asks if there is any chance I'm pregnant......

swirlgirl

[Jolene]

I have a question for you folks... What do you say to a person such as myself who doesn't believe in homosexuality, doesn't condone it, and believes it's wrong. YET, can have friends who are gay, and even a friend who is TS? I don't suppport any part of your political or social agenda. However if anyone messes w/ my friends I won't hesitate to put them in their place.

My thing is if the person isn't a sl-t, works hard and is overall a decent person I really don't care about their sex life. I don't want to hear about it, but then I don't want to hear about anyone's sex life. Just wondering if you guys are as accepting of people with my beliefs as my friends are of mine. Every once in a while I ask that when I have a chance.


I deffinately march to my own drummer. I may be a hard core Christian Conservative, but I don't let those politics tell me any more than I do the liberal agenda... :D

Hopefully your Dr.s would have a similiar attitude as they take an oath to do their job.

[illusion129]

Actually, Jolene, people that believe such as yourself don't bother me in the least bit. I do get annoyed sometimes by the slander I get and the stares from people but I realize that it's not their fault, they're just curious, such as with my chronic illness or if I were carrying a monkey on my shoulder. Lol :p.

One thing I do want you to know ahead of time is that I was raised in the Pilgrim Holiness Church; in case you don't know that denomination, it is a very strict, old-Christian based church in which women still *must* wear long hair, no pants, and no jewlery. Men must be the sole supporter of the home (unless disabled), must not wear any jewelry (not even a wedding band), and must keep their hair very short. Family life is of reading the bible every night with each other and the only other "real life" reading material we may view is the local newspaper; TV is considered VERY bad in our book.

Ok, now that I mentioned how I was raised, I must tell you that I do agree we are "born" with this being our set way of life. I was raised to believe being homosexual was so wrong my entire life yet I could not deny who I was any longer so I moved to a more open denomination of religion at 17 (now 20). I find myself much happier now in my own church and I've been (IMO) a much better person too.

My aunt and uncle were the ones who took me to church my whole life and they are the first two people (in my family) I told about myself. They were hesitant at first to accept me but they knew I'd been raised right my entire life, that I was the same person I ever wase, and that it had to be I was the way I am because of the higher power; after that they took me back into their lives with arms wide open. Sometimes we forget to think that God works wonders in even the most mysterious ways.

I hope that you take my previous religious background into account before you consider me just "another" homosexual. It's not that I'm any better than the rest, but I wanted to make that point so that you'd know it's just not a choice any of us make; I know sometimes to make life easier it would be great if I were a "straight" person but it's just not who I am. I believe God made me this way to take the turmoils of life from those who do not understand and to try to teach them that there are different ways of life, no matter how different they may seem.

With that, I'll let you be. I'm just glad that you're open enough to have some homosexual/transgender friends in your life. Just because you don't believe in the way we live doesn't mean you have to bash us for it. If that were the case, we homosexuals would be out comitting hate crimes against heteros, but do you ever read about that happening in the news? No. It's always the other way around because some ignorant people just can't accept the fact that others are and will be different.

[Matt]

I suspect I will never understand why some christian groups place such a big emphasis on sex. It's good that you don't bash people though.

I'm lucky that I haven't had to deal with too many homophobic doctors.

[Jolene]

So your religion you were raised in was similiar to how the Amish people live? It sounds like it, but if I'm wrong let me know. The only gay people I have trouble with are the ones who like to "let everything hang out" in parades etc. I bet you know what I mean there. I think those type give all of you a bad name. Also I don't like ****ty behavior. I don't care if the people are gay or straight. I know, I'm an uncompromising wench. But I am me... :D :p

As for the "Are you possibly pregnant" question I laugh hysterically. I tell them if I am we are all in trouble as I've been abstaining for 15 yrs now.

[Matt]

Jolene,

There are all kinds of hetersexuals who let it all hang out...pretty blatantly ****ty. I don't go for public displays of affection all that much. But, I don't see why it would bother you more if you saw gay people doing that.

[AncientWolf]

As a gay man who most people wouldn't think is gay and who has had people argue with him, "There's no way you're gay.", I understand that the extremes of gay society can be quite a bit shocking when it's not in your "norm". Even I used to be one of those people who would say, "I can't stand the really effeminate or flamboyant gay guys and they give the rest of us a bad name." However, I have come to realize that everyone is who they are.

First off, some men are naturally effeminate and some women are naturally masculine....regardless of sexual orientation. Secondly, even if a man (as an example, but you can switch it easy for a woman) *chose* to be effeminate and flamboyant only after coming out of the closet, that's his prerogative. It doesn't hurt me in any way. It may be a release for that individual to be *able* to be flamboyant and/or effeminate. I know from personal experience how hard it can be to be in the closet and to come out of the closet. It is a traumatic experience to many and even a deadly experience to some. If a man (or woman) finds release and comraderie in changing their persona or releasing a persona they have pent up for a long time, why should anyone else care that they are living free and happy?

I do understand that it's uncomfortable to deal with things that are so different from what we consider our personal "norm", but that is part of living on a small planet with 7 billion other people. There's bound to be diversity and things way different from what we're used to, but we have to learn to be accepting of people for who they are so long as no one is being hurt by their actions.

Well, that's my piece for now.

Peace,

Daniel

[Cutter]

Well said, Daniel.

Thank you.

As a gay man who most people wouldn't think is gay and who has had people argue with him, "There's no way you're gay.", I understand that the extremes of gay society can be quite a bit shocking when it's not in your "norm". Even I used to be one of those people who would say, "I can't stand the really effeminate or flamboyant gay guys and they give the rest of us a bad name." However, I have come to realize that everyone is who they are.

First off, some men are naturally effeminate and some women are naturally masculine....regardless of sexual orientation. Secondly, even if a man (as an example, but you can switch it easy for a woman) *chose* to be effeminate and flamboyant only after coming out of the closet, that's his prerogative. It doesn't hurt me in any way. It may be a release for that individual to be *able* to be flamboyant and/or effeminate. I know from personal experience how hard it can be to be in the closet and to come out of the closet. It is a traumatic experience to many and even a deadly experience to some. If a man (or woman) finds release and comraderie in changing their persona or releasing a persona they have pent up for a long time, why should anyone else care that they are living free and happy?

I do understand that it's uncomfortable to deal with things that are so different from what we consider our personal "norm", but that is part of living on a small planet with 7 billion other people. There's bound to be diversity and things way different from what we're used to, but we have to learn to be accepting of people for who they are so long as no one is being hurt by their actions.

Well, that's my piece for now.

Peace,

Daniel

[Jolene]

As I said I don't like ****ty behavior whether gay or straight. It doesn't bother me more if the person being a **** is gay. I think there's a place and time. Let's put it this way. When it's a public street that anyone passing by is subject to the show I don't think people should have to deal with it. Whether the people are gay or straight.

Now I went into a bar in Denver. The place used to strictly be a gay mans leather bar. Women as a rule weren't welcome there. Because a friend of mine was a very prominent member of the gay community I wasn't exactly welcome but I was tollerated. Now I could have whined and complained about the guys and what they didn't have on. But I was forwarned about it and made the decision to go there and stand by my friend who was being recognized for community service, regardless of the situation. Well everything went rather well and I was told I was welcome anytime. Now to many that means nothing. Believe me for a straight woman to be told that by these guys that was a compliment. I must admit that I stared at the ceiling a lot.. The floor wasn't the place to be looking in that bar... :D

An example of what I mean... I went to the 4th of July celebration at a place where people with AIDS go when they can no longer live on their own. Now there were family members there of people who had died, people who lived there at the time and so on. I don;t think that is the proper time to be wearing shorts so tight and high that everything shows. The guy thought he had the right to do whatever he wanted regardless of the people who were there to be with their family members. The man who runs it asked him nicely to go put some pants on. He refused so I had the honor of escorting him off the property. The family members of people there shouldn't have to deal with things like that. Just as one of the women who was straight by the way was letting her b--bs hang out. She was also told to leave. I'm not sure if anything I said makes sense but I guess it doesn't have to. :)

[graymalkin]

The mods have stickied this thread for us, and I've expanded the original "statement of purpose" a bit.

graymalkin

[AncientWolf]

The mods have stickied this thread for us, and I've expanded the original "statement of purpose" a bit.

graymalkin


Way cool. I love the mods here. JL and the Mods do such an awesome job with this place.


Daniel

[Aussiewombat79]

I don't believe my sexuality has anything to do with my neurological conditions and people like Jolene don't bother me either and I agree with Matt...why would gay/bi people showing affection bother you more than straight people showing affection????....it's all the SAME!!!

By the way Jolene, you may think homosexuality is wrong but in future please keep your personal beliefs to yourself as some of us aren't interested.

Selena

[graymalkin]

This forum is not particularly about sexuality having anything causative to do with neurological conditions, although some neurological conditions can certainly affect sexual functioning. It's more about identifying as LGBT, and how that identification can impact our interactions with the medical profession.

As a bi woman (which I also am; lesbian-identified bi, specifically), you're probably less likely to have encountered problems than someone who is lesbian, gay or trans. There can still be issues, though.

BTW, Jolene has a right to express her opinions on this forum too. You may not be interested in them, and if so you can simply ignore future posts from her. But as long as she doesn't violate the Terms of Service she's as welcome as anyone to share her thoughts and ask her questions.

gray

[Jolene]

By the way Jolene, you may think homosexuality is wrong but in future please keep your personal beliefs to yourself as some of us aren't interested.

Selena

Something you need to learn is that I am an AMERICAN. This website is based in AMERICA. In AMERICA I have the right to voice my opinion here as long as I do it within the confines of the rules of this website.

Your attitude is so typical of people with your mentality. You are so tollerant and believe in diversity except when the person disagrees with you. Here I am the one who is allegedly so intollerant but I am the one who practices diversity. How interesting.


Gray- Thank you for your understanding. I have done nothing except dare to say something some people have trouble accepting.

Also, I don;t appreciate people making out in public whether they are gay or straight... Male or female...:)

[Aussiewombat79]

Jolene.

You appear to be an very aggressive person, I did NOT at any stage say you couldn't voice your opinion and in fact you're entilted to your opinion, and the only reason I said anything against what you've said is because I find the way you express it offensive and judgemental and I have a right to voice MY opinion on that apart from that your opinion is that...your opinion!!!

As for my attitude, you have no right to judge me or my attitude as you don't know me or anything about my life from a bar of soap.

I also come from a country (Australia) where diversity is happily tolerated, accepted and embraced, so DON'T tell me what I need to learn!!

Selena

Something you need to learn is that I am an AMERICAN. This website is based in AMERICA. In AMERICA I have the right to voice my opinion here as long as I do it within the confines of the rules of this website.

Your attitude is so typical of people with your mentality. You are so tollerant and believe in diversity except when the person disagrees with you. Here I am the one who is allegedly so intollerant but I am the one who practices diversity. How interesting.


Gray- Thank you for your understanding. I have done nothing except dare to say something some people have trouble accepting.

Also, I don;t appreciate people making out in public whether they are gay or straight... Male or female...:)

[graymalkin]

By the way Jolene, you may think homosexuality is wrong but in future please keep your personal beliefs to yourself as some of us aren't interested.

In all fairness, Jolene, the above is what you said. "Keep your personal beliefs to yourself" didn't sound like you were accepting Jolene's right to express her opinions.

It seems to me that both of you maybe overreacted a bit, but that's neither here nor there. This forum really isn't the place for arguments about homosexuality itself; it's for discussion among LGBT folk about their experiences with neurological disorders & interactions with the medical community. Some questions & comments from straights are inevitable & okay as long as reasonably respectful, though.

BTW, I'm awfully fond of wombats; have been since I was a kid. :D

gray

[Jolene]

Sounds to me like you need to take your bar of soap and clean up your attitude. :D :D

[lostnempti1]

ok people.....make love not war...:)

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q147/lostnlonli1/globe_hearts.gif

here's this for each and every one of you...:D

[graymalkin]

Let the congregation say, "Amen!" ;)

gray

[lostnempti1]

Let the congregation say, "Amen!" ;)

gray


"Amen"...:) ....and why not sing "Joy to the world" while we're at it.....:D

[graymalkin]

Which version? I vote for Hoyt Axton's:

Joy to the world,
All the boys and girls,
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea,
Joy to you and me.

gray :D

[lostnempti1]

Which version? I vote for Hoyt Axton's:

Joy to the world,
All the boys and girls,
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea,
Joy to you and me.

gray :D


that's the one....:D

how about reciting in unison "why can't we all just get along?";) :D

[Jolene]

There's too much whine in the "can't we all just get along" How about... "get along or I break your knee caps"... Much better.... :p :D :D

[AncientWolf]

grey......... Jeremiah was a bullfrog, was a good friend of mine, never understood a single word he said but I helped him drink his wine. :D

And now the happy happy joy joy song,

Happy happy joy joy, happy happy joy joy happy happy happy happy happy happy joy joy! (thank you Ren and Stempie).

Let our arguments be washed away with the waves and our love for everyone brought to the surface.

Namaste,

Daniel

[lostnempti1]

There's too much whine in the "can't we all just get along" How about... "get along or I break your knee caps"... Much better.... :p :D :D

wow Jolene....:eek:

hate to run into you in a dark alley...:p :D ;)

[Jolene]

Dark alleys I try to avoid... I even scare myself.. :D :D

Heck, up where you live wouldn't it be a dark country road? :D

[lostnempti1]

Dark alleys I try to avoid... I even scare myself.. :D :D

Heck, up where you live wouldn't it be a dark country road? :D

what's the matter...you have nothing better to do on the holiday wench????:p ;) :D

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q147/lostnlonli1/thMC2Gold4.gif

merry christmas to you too...:rolleyes: :p :D

[Jolene]

Merry Christmas. I'm working so no. I don't have anything better to do. :)

[lostnempti1]

Merry Christmas. I'm working so no. I don't have anything better to do. :)


Truck Driver Eh...you must be a BIG WENCH...:p ;) :D :D

[Weasel]

Wow, this thread has seen some turmoil. Yikes!

I'm a lesbian and have been with my partner for nearly 19 years. I wouldn't go to a critical doctor's appointment without her, and I wouldn't even know how to go about hiding our relationship any more. I think doctors can be as accepting as you let them be. The more open we are about our relationships, the more commonplace the experience will be for these doctors. Besides, these doctors are people. Chances are good that they have a gay brother or lesbian neighbor and are educated in sensitivity, at least by their communities, about such things.

I was nervous about it 15 years ago. Now? Nah!

--Weasel