What Are The Things You Look Forward To

[Kathi49]

I was thinking of this this morning when reflecting on certain things I want to accomplish in the future. Because were are all in pain in one way or another, I was just wondering what keeps you all motivated in terms of things you look forward to or would like to accomplish.

I know that I would love to see my daughter get married and have some babies someday. :) I would also love to go to Hawaii with my best friend; a pact we made two years ago when we said at age 50 we would go. But I don't know if that is going to happen now due to my conditions and the fact that her son will be going into college. But there are many, many more goals I haven't achieved yet and motivation is part of it due to the meds, being tired that kind of thing. Yet, still, deep down there are things I would love to do if and when I can. And it ranges from something as large as a trip to something as simple as gardening (even though that would be rough on the neck and back). :eek:

So, what are the things you all look forward to that basically keep you going? :) It can be work related or simply looking towards retirement. Just anything!

[ErinENj]

There are a few things I still look forward to, and when I get to them, they'll just mean that much more to me. Everybody knows my number one right now. Graduation and my trip to Amsterdam. I've got one month and 12 days, not like I'm counting, until I am a college graduate! Then another week, and I'll be on a plane, winging my way to Europe! (It's my graduation gift. My grandmother paid for our airfare and hotel. And one of my bestest friends is coming too.)

The others are a bit further away, but I'll get there. Like marrying the man of my dreams (i'm too picky not to :p ) and have kids. I'd definately want to have a boy and a girl, just like my parents did. And, unless (or when) the man I marry is wealthy, they'll be something like 4 or 5 years apart so that I'll only have 1 in college at a time, just like my parents planned.

Career wise, I've got that all planned out. I was thinking of starting out at a nice weekly newspaper, where I can get into the rythm of newspaper writing without being too under the gun. Then I'd like to move up to a smaller daily paper, like the one right by my house, that's small enough for me to be able to get my feet wet at a daily without being at the best daily and screwing up my career by screwing up an article or two. Then I'll move to a bigger daily, where I can be challenged but still comfortable. Then, maybe a Washington D.C. or a New York paper, something huge, something national, where I can really make a difference. Now, I don't know if I'll make all those steps, or if I'll skip one or two (my mom gave my resume to someone who works in D.C. with an international press corps. and there's a chance, allbeit a small one, that I might get a job there right off the bat, so that'd be skipping pretty much all of my steps and going right to the top of the game right out of college). But, that's what I hope will happen. We'll see.

So yeah, I still have things I dream about and life plans I refuse to give up just because I'm in pain. It's going to be hard, no question, but I will make it happen, just like I did for college. It may have taken me a bit longer, but I am pulling it off and doing it pretty well. I just keep my mantra going, "I'll get there, whether it takes me the average time or the longer path. Just as long as I get there."

[A.K.]

Heaven!

Oh, you meant while I am still here didn't you?!:D I look forward to being well enough to go out on a somewhat regular basis and do speaking engagements. I speak at Christian Women's Events and Seminars and also for other types of specialty Christian groups.

I actually went yesterday and did a Bible study for a Senior Adult group at my home church and it was a blast. They wore me out though so I know I'm not ready to put much on my calendar yet!

[curiousforever]

At the moment? Getting the kitten fixed so my other cats stop trying to spray me. Fortunately they can't as they are fixed.

Guess that's what happens when you have 4 boy cats, 4 sons, and a hubby in the house? Too much testosterone?

I'll have to think on something else.

[jimac]

Kathi,
I am sure that my answer is really not what you are asking for.
What I am "currently looking forward to:
C5/6 and C6/7 work (ACDF?) and Ulnar tranposition on the right (to match my left) arm.
Hopefully, after all of this I will have much less burning/tingling and pain in my neck, shoulder and both arms.

Then I will be looking forward to working around the house much more and at my job.

Jim

[Kathi49]

Erin,

See! You have one more month to go and already have your career mapped out! I hope you land the job you want and the man too and have lots of babies! :D Oh, and I am glad that you get to go after all!!!:)

AK,

Speaking at Christian Seminars and Groups sounds wonderful. And is very similar to what my daughter is doing with her church. She just got back from Israel and loved it. She takes Theology courses and does a little bit of preaching.

Cf,

OMG! I had a cat spray in my car once. I think my husband had been feeding it and it made my car its home for a few days! So, I know what you mean. As for Testosterone, I just have the ONE man in my house so it isn't too bad. You have your hands full! Although my whole downstairs is torn up at the moment waiting for new flooring because my husband has moved everything around now.

[Mark N]

Kathi, I look at this from what I have done in the past as a CPer. It is difficult to look forward to much now that I have gotten so restricted in my activities.

What do I look forward to, every day with my son as we have a blast [as much as I can] and he is so easy to love with the good heart he has. he keeps his parents laughing with what he comes up with and the way he sees things. I am looking forward to having my daughter and mother in this weekend for Easter. It will be nice to have all of us together with my mom here too. It will be different as we will have to have a menu that accomodates my daughter's recent diagnosis of hypoglycimia.

I will be getting a laptop in a week or so and it will allow me to stay on the computer more than 10 minutes at a time. Maybe I can write the football book my wife has been after me to do.

Jim, looking forward to a surgery that could eliminate your pain is something to look forward to and gives you a better chance at success.

[Kathi49]

Jim,

I wish you well with your surgery; when is it by the way? I must have been posting the same time you did as I just now saw your post. :) Anyway, yes, hopefully it will eliminate a large amount of that pain if not all. BUT...just be careful while working around the house; keep in mind it takes awhile for the fusion process to complete. :) I have maybe 3 more weeks to go wearing this Bone Growth Stimulator and hopefully, I will be done cooking! :)

[jimac]

Kathi,

I do not have a definite dx from a NS at this time. My Neuro did a NCV and cervical MRI. I am in the process of giving up on conservative treatments. The intense numbness and pain is returning. Maybe an EMG will be next. I am also trying to find a NS. I have been told to look at the University Of Alabama in Birmingham. My Neuro has told me not to wait much longer. I do have a great OS hand/arm specialist for the right elbo ulnar (he did my left last Oct). But, I want to see a NS about my neck first. I will be considering the NS's that my Neuro recommends. I am no stranger to pain. I have 3 - 24 hour migraines every week.
But when you mix the head pain and arm/shoulder/neck pain it is unbearable.
When I know surgery dates.... I will post when and where.... ugh... surgery.. what a thought.

BTW: Has your timer gone off yet? Your should be done cooking by now...LOL.

Jim

[Kathi49]

Jim,

I just had the C5/C6 fused in September. The C3/C4 was done in 2004 and the headaches were unbearable.

Anyway, the surgery is not so bad at all. But I didn't have two levels done at once either. I wish you well with this. :)

And, I think my "timer" actually went off in January. At least that is when the NS said I was almost done fusing. But, just like the last time, he wanted me to wear the stimulator for 3 more months. Well, that 3 months ends April 24th! I don't mind wearing it for 4 hours a day because I can stop and start it at anytime. It just gets tedious after awhile. And I THINK I may have missed wearing it at all for at least 4 days out of the 6 months. Surely, he won't make me make up for it LOL! There's a little memory in there to tell them that you have been using it LOL!

[curiousforever]

I'm looking forward to them figuring out what's wrong with me?

[BrokenBladder]

I'm looking forward to seeing my boys get out of school.
I want to be able to get out and so some things, but natuarally I need my health to improve to accomplish that.
Currently the biggest thing I'm looking foward to is putting on some weight. It has been a struggle for me since the end of December and I'm really getting frustrated.:( I have a goal to put back on all of the weight I lost, which was 30 pounds, by the end of June. Wish me luck!!:)

[Mark N]

Lisa, good luck with your weight gain goal.

I have so many things to look forward to just this spring. I want to watch as my son throws the discus this track season and improves. I look forward to more nice days to work out in the yard [ok it is very little work but at least I can be out in the sun and move a bit]. I look forward to seeing how our house looks when my wife gets our flower bed planted and to hear people walk by talking about how pretty it is.

I am looking forward to see how my football camp [I have another coach run it any more] blossoms as we have gotten the Indy Colts to sponsor it. How many young men that wouldn't have the oppurtunity now take advantage of a quality football camp right at home. I am so thankful that my coaching friend has kept it going and growing every year. I will have to stop as I could make a list that wouldn't stop.

[Kira]

I'm scared to look forward to much of anything because I know now that I can't do even the stuff I looked forward to a year or two ago, like becoming a pediatrician (can't physically do the residency), having kids of my own (mitochondrial disease gets inherited through the mom's side), having a relationship (my last one was 7 yrs long and we lived together for 3 of those years, and I don't know if I'll ever find anything like that again, especially now that I am sick and come with so much "baggage")... even smaller stuff, like taking trips, getting a better apartment, paying off some of my student loans, etc.

I guess I can look forward to the really short-term stuff. I am going on a trip for work in a couple of weeks and get to stay in a really nice hotel. I'm looking forward to the project I'm doing for my field experience this summer (working on disparities in infant mortality in my hometown). And the little stuff, like spending time with my friends, family, and big goofy dog.

I just hate the fact that it's impossible to plan for the future. Seeing someone my age die of the same disease I have made it hard to ignore how serious this all is, and how fast everything can get smashed by this damned disease.

[Mark N]

Kira, I have learned not to look too far in the future as I used to do. I have learned, along with my family, that even short plans can be interupted. I have learned to be shortsided and be happy about the few things I can do each day. I understand it is easier for me because I have had my success early and was able to do a couple of things I wanted: joined the Marine Corps and got to teach and coach football.

This disablity would be much better if I could have turned to a second career. It would have been nice to finish up with my astronomy degree that I originally thought I was going to do before I was led by God to a coaching and teaching career. Disability has taught me to appreciate the simple things in life. I have always appreciated the simple things but now I can focus on them. I get to focus on my daughter and son's career and see how their lives turn out. There are still good things to look forward to for us it just isn't good health or big accomplishments for us if we are far along in our disease. If you are still able to work then know you can do more than you think. While fighting through spinal surgeries and the chronic pain, I was able to coach three teams to the state championship [two of them won it] that others thought couldn't happen. I was able to improve two other programs before the disablity hit. Know that you can do good things even while you are fighting the pain you have.

[Scar Tissue]

Good Morning everyone and I hope you are all well! I look forward to the day my w/c battle is over so I can move on from living in the unknown and trying to have a little more normal life. I also look forward to getting some much needed home repairs, updating mine and my daughters cars, taking my wife for a well overdue vacation,(Don't know how it's going to be with this pain, so we're taking my sister-in-law along). This w/c case has been Hell from the beginning. We are looking at a six-figure settlement, the wording from my attorney and that should pay off the house and let me do the things above. That's some of the monetary things.

Other things include watching my 3 grandkids grow, my daughter graduate from College (She's doing great at an all girl 1000 student private school),maybe one day if this pain can be controlled better getting back on my motorcycle again, living a more normal life in general. Will these things happen? I don't know, but I have to have something to look forward to or there's no reason to get out of bed in the morning. Even with the varied degrees of pain we all feel, we must battle on, hoping for relief someday and waking up that one day feeling 100% better!!:)

[Kathi49]

cf,

I am with you there. My current goal is to figure out the shoulder/arm stuff! Just another exciting development in CP!

Lisa,

You will feel much better when your boys and grown and gone. Just kidding! I know what you mean by getting them graduated! I went through the "empty nest" thing for a short time after my daughter went to college. But I got over it quick too LOL! Weight gain? I know that is a biggie! So....like I told Kim, get out there and eat those cheeseburgers. :D Kidding again...I don't know if you are even supposed to have those!

Mark,

I am more like you in that just doing little things like working in the yard would be nice. But last year when I did it, my right hand just couldn't grasp the pruners without pain. Maybe this year it will be different...I hope. And, yes, it would be nice to see how the football camp you started takes off! :)

Kira,

I understand about looking torwards the short term and harder to look much past that. But as Mark said, you have done amazingly well. I hope you can accomplish more! Your trip sounds fun and your project sounds very interesting.

ST,

I would love to go on a vacation! Going back to Hawaii with my best friend and our spouses would be a blast. But I don't think it will happen this year, if ever. But I sure would love it! Watching your daughter graduate from college is definitely well worth it. I did that last year and even though the trip and the pain was brutal, I was soooo proud of her; the pain was worth it. And someday I hope I can have some grandkids too. AND...the point about getting out of bed is a good one. It seems all these types of things everyone has listed ARE reasons to keep moving! :) Yeah, and I say that right after I took a nap just now LOL! But I know what you mean. I try to do a little every day even if it is something stupid like going out to get stamps heeee!

[Mark N]

I am looking forward to getting my SUV fixed since someone pulled out in front of me yesterday [ran a stop sign] and it isn't driveable right now. It does look like it has enough damage to keep from driving it but something is wrong with the brake in the right front wheel. I just had it in the shop two months ago for the same right front fender when it was hit while being parked. The great news is that my son, dog, nor I were hurt and neither was the young lady that ran the stop sign. I had a police car coming at me that was about 1/2 block from the accident so I have a good observer about what happened. The police determined she was at fault so that is taken care of; now I just need the insurance company to get moving today so I can get it in for an estimate. I was only going about 12 mph by the time we hit her but it triggered my thoracic pains and spasms. The police wanted to call an ambulance but I told him there wasn't any need so she avoided that expense. The best thing is the air bag didn't activate and cause me more pain and trouble.

[jena1225]

So glad you are ok Mark!

[curiousforever]

I'm looking forward to seeing my boys get out of school.
I want to be able to get out and so some things, but natuarally I need my health to improve to accomplish that.
Currently the biggest thing I'm looking foward to is putting on some weight. It has been a struggle for me since the end of December and I'm really getting frustrated.:( I have a goal to put back on all of the weight I lost, which was 30 pounds, by the end of June. Wish me luck!!:)

I'll give ya some!:p

[curiousforever]

Lisa, good luck with your weight gain goal.


I am looking forward to see how my football camp [I have another coach run it any more] blossoms as we have gotten the Indy Colts to sponsor it. How many young men that wouldn't have the oppurtunity now take advantage of a quality football camp right at home. I am so thankful that my coaching friend has kept it going and growing every year. I will have to stop as I could make a list that wouldn't stop.

That's pretty cool! I think a guy I used to go to school with played for them for a time - a kicker - Gardocki.

But he was on the Steelers when they won the superbowl...saw him kick....

Wow Mark - glad you're ok! That airbag is a PITA. It burns.

[Diandra]

Hi All,
Great idea for a thread Kathi. Thank you for starting it.

I look forward to fulfilling a dream of going to Italy one day. I am of Italian descent and want to learn to speak Italian and visit Pescara where my family is originally from.

I think each day we should bring a little beauty into our lives and I would like to share this website. Some days, when really down and unable to do much, I just sit and look at some of these amazing photographs and it brightens my day. They also have great ecards to send.
http://www.quantum-leap-strategies.com/photo_contest/photo_contest.html

I hope and pray all your dreams come true.

Happy Easter to all my friends on this chronic pain forum,
Diandra

[Kathi49]

Diandra,

That sounds awesome!

I would love to visit Ireland and Scotland myself. But, it will probably never happen. As everyone already knows, I love genealogy. So, some of my goals would be to retrace the steps of my ancestors and go to the various county courthouses. I know, it sounds boring. But there is just sooooo much information out there! And I love digging through it. :)

I will have to take a look at that website later and just take my time browsing through it. Thanks!

[GardeniaGirl]

My life is not very exciting anymore, in fact I find it rather boring.

But all week I have been looking forward to painting an accent wall in my living room (an accent wall is just one wall painted in a different color from the other walls).

So a friend helped me today and it looks great. The walls are an off-white, with a light grey carpet. The accent wall is this very pretty dark greyish-brown.

It makes my apartment look so much better and not as much like a boring, generic apartment now.

It was fun and not too taxing on my body, fortunately.

[Mark N]

GardeniaGirl, it sounds like you had a great time and got a good result. It feels great to do something that improves our living spaces especially when we don't have to pay too much of a price for doing it.

[ErinENj]

Diandra: I've wanted to go trace my roots for so long. I think it's an amazing thing to be able to see where your family came from. Trying to track mine is a little difficult, at least on my mother's side. The big joke is how her family came over on the boat after the Mayflower, but there's a bit of truth to it. Many people get a thrill going to Ellis Island and seeing their family there, but I can't do that with either side of my family. I have absolutely no clue about when and where people from my dad's side came over. My mom's family has a LOT of history here in NJ. Back in the day, NJ was split in two, East and West (even though it really was more like north and south from all the maps I've seen). It turns out that my grandmother on my mom's side's ancestors were given I believe West New Jersey by the king of England, sometime after the Mayflower reached the coast. What kills me the most: they GAVE it all away! There are no words for what even a 5 or 10 acre plot of land would be worth nowadays.There's very little land left that's buildable lots in NJ, so people are falling over themselves to get a small plot of land to build a monstrous mc' mansion. My dad's relatives at least have a starting point. I'm actually 76th in line for a castle in Scotland. I can't remember where, but there is actually a castle in Scotland that has been in our family for centuries and still bears our name. I was supposed to go see it for my graduation trip, but financial matters and my physical ability made it impossible for us to make it there. But someday, I definately plan on doing a tour of Scotland to see my castle, AND figure out my mother's side's history and my father's mother's side too. It should be a REALLY long tour, since I'm pretty much 99% Scottish, with 1% French. And I'm positive we'll both get there at some point!! I've heard Italy is fantastic! My Latin teacher is Italian (she came over here about 20 years ago, so she was there until a little after she was done with college. Do you know, in Italy, you never speak to a professor out of respect? It's so amazingly different than here!) and when she speaks about her life there, you can really see how beautiful and amazing it is there just through what she says, and the look on her face when she talks about it. I know for sure that you'll get there, sooner or later.

Gardenia: I'm very glad that you have a fantastic new wall and that it didn't completely kill you to do it! It's amazing what a fresh coat of paint can do! My brother's old room was so depressing, but as soon as I got my hands and paint job on it, it looks like he never ruined this room! hehe! It's great that your color worked out well and that your apartment has more personality to it!

[Kathi49]

Erin,

Don't get me started on Genealogy. :) It is my hobby! And I have a good deal of information to help you get started if you are interested. Just let me know and I can help you out with it. I could go on and on but I would bore people to death LOL! Just know that sometimes, as you said, people do not know where to begin. The key is to start from the present and work backwards. My friend did it the other way and had a LOT of trouble. It is fun and I love it!

[curiousforever]

Getting John's surgery over!

It's been very stressful - daycare couldn't take 2 of the boys in the am's (they are each staying with a different family...and 2 of them use the daycare in the AM) and then one can't go to that family till around 8pm tonight. One family couldn't go to the kids' baseball game - the family is sick - and it's one that is taking one of my boys.

AHHHH!!!

[Diandra]

I just learned something recently that may interest all you genealogy buffs.
Before Ellis Island there was Castle Garden. If you cannot find family on the Ellis Island site, they may have come in via Castle Garden. Just a warning, this is addictive !!!!

http://www.castlegarden.org/

Have fun searching,
Diandra

[Kathi49]

Diandra,

Yes, it IS addicting! :) I told ya! LOL Once you get going it is hard to stop. And thank you for the site. I was aware of it but others might not have been.