Just in Time

[Fig]

Helloooo!!! Oh boy, we're back at last. I've really needed this place, and tonight--here you are. I changed my name--I used to call myself "Beani" on here.
Anyway, I'm going through a really rough time--very depressed and nothing seems to help. I try all of my coping techniques, but they're all wearing thin. My meds are holding their own, I guess, but..... I isolate myself some days but try not to do it too much--I know isolating is deadly.

I just don't seem to care very much about anything except my dear birds and staying by myself--even tho' I'm lonely. Crazy, huh.......

Thanks for listening. Marion

[joy]

from joy

I'm going to edit what I just wrote. I am not good at giving help I'm afraid. I am more in need of receiving it myself. I am typical in that I isolate myself when I need help. Hope people discover BrainTalk is back soon and return and you get to feeling better.

[teddiebears]

Hi, Joy and Marion - so sorry to hear that you two are having a rough time of it. :(

Over the past several months I've been dealing with some serious depression and isolating myself too. Like you, Marion, I sort of lost touch with my best coping tools and I'd been feeling pretty lost and lonely... I've allowed myself to sleep for several days in a row because I just seem to be exhausted much of the time. :(

Well, I just wanted to stop and say hello - I'm so glad that Braintalk is back!!

teddiebears

[Tootsie]

It sure is good to have our BT back again. I have missed chatting with everyone and hearing how they are coping with all these challenges that are called life.

I've been trying to keep myself busy without overdoing anything. I seem to sleep better and not get so upset over minor things when I can feel I have accomplished something during the day. Today was cleaning the first 5 pews on one side of our church sanctuary. We are having a big celebration later in the month, which is actually a birthday party for the church.

I have 2-3 craft projects going also so that will keep me occupied during some TV time tonight.

I hope you all feel better soon. Cheerio.

[~KeLL*wants*answers~]

Hi everyone
Tootsie it has been a very long time!!
It's good to see you again!!
I have a really bad memory.Please forgive me if someone remembers me and i dont recognize you.The meds i take just wreck havoc on my brain....

Your right Tootsie,if i get up and not allow myself to sleep in i feel better too.

Somedays i just dont care if i get up or not!!
I know those are the days when i need to pull myself up by the bootstraps and just do it.Whether i feel like it or not!!!
If i dont ,i know all day long im gonna beat myself up mentally for laying in the bed and hiding from the world!!
I have'nt been outta this house to visit anyone for almost a month!!
I lost my job back in june because i needed to have surgery.
I had my rotater cuff repaired.
So i understand what you guys are going through.
I have been in this house so long.I am actually afraid of other people.I never thought i would be like this but here iam..................
Take care and i hope you keep coming back to talk !!
~Kell~

[Buttons2]

Well I had to change my name cause someone with anger problems took my old name!

I went through bad depression when BT was off, guess I needed my daily dose of support from you all!:rolleyes:

Whenever I get to thinking I don't need all those vits I push other people to take-well, after a few weeks the depression comes creeping back & I allow myself to wallow in it. The weather was beautiful here,nothing of major trauma had happened, I just got in the black hole (again) & possibly pulled myself out just in time. I credit B12 for helping me,it also gives me energy to get out & DO something.

I adopted a dog last spring to force me to get out everyday & walk. whenever I see those commercials for anti-depressants where they state that everyone suffers along with you & show that dog-well it makes me feel guilty about depriving my dog of interaction & I FORCE myself to get out & play with him if I'm able to walk good that day.

Wish I had some magic formula to help all of us that find it impossible to get out of bed some days....it's a vicious cycle. If we stay inside pretty soon it's fairly impossible to change our routine.

I've also become reclusive! Nobody wants to be around someone while they hobble around & have a SAD face.

So, glad we are back here & I'll try to always lend a hand if possible! I felt like I'd lost my entire family of internet buddies when BT crashed,for days I kept clicking on in the hopes of finding it back! Just recently discovered the BT2 but it's not the same & we didn't have this forum on there.....

Let's try to support each other once again!

Take care everyone & a BIG HUG!
Buttons2

[Tootsie]

Buttons2
It's good to see you back! As I looked at your new name I couldn't help but think of a bit of whimsy, that you might have chosen ButtonUP. I wondered if I could get my old name back but figured I'd do Tootsietwo, or "too," if needed.

You expressed it so well when you described the loss of BT and our daily boost of support and encouragement from friends here. I felt lost and abandoned for several weeks and always clicked to see if we were back up and running once more. Then, too, I also felt a little guilty knowing that John L wouldn't abandon us. I know that he was concerned that it was taking so long and HE had to do all the work in addition to his employment job.

This all came soon after army 68 94 died and that was an additional loss for me. From time to time I do reread some of the things that he had posted and sent and it does help.

Now, allergies are rampant and the sneezing, coughing, wheezing and general misery are crowding out all the usual impairments in seeking my attention. I keep hoping the next big rain will settle things down. Cheerio.

[Fig]

Hey hey Buttons and Tootsie!!
So good to see you again. Hopefully it'll help us to be able to talk to each other again. I know it always lifted me to see your posts. I love Tootsie's "Cheerio".

I used to be Beani, in case you're wondering. Fig is the name of one of my dear little parrots, who died 2 years ago. I still cry for him.

Time for my Ambien and Nitey-nite. Ttyl. Hugs, Marion

[Buttons2]

Yes Tootsie I always think of Army & how much he went through....thought of him yesterday as soon as I saw your name!

Have to believe he's watching us to make sure we don't let the despair get to us too much.

Whatever happened to his cat, Psycho??

Take care,Buttons

[Tootsie]

Hi Buttons,
From what he told me, in his will, he had arranged for Psycho to go to some kind of sanctuary established by Ernest Hemingway in Florida for cats. I have no way of knowing if this is what happened. Cheerio.

[Fig]

Let's hope that all went as planned and that Psycho is enjoying retirement at the sanctuary.

How are you all tonight? Marion

[Buttons2]

Thanks Tootsie! I've heard of this place in Florida-quite interesting! The gov. was trying to get rid of the cats or greatly reduce their numbers-on the basis that the compound there wasn't licensed or some such nonsense!

The cats have been there since the 30's I believe?? Hemingway's wishes were for them to always have a home,guess we cannot trust too much these days!

Anyone gets bored,might do some up to date research on this,probably issue has been settled by now since it's been awhile when I read about this outrage!

P.S. Polydactyl cats have 6-7 toes!

Rest in peace Russell,you kept many of us going with your amazing strength!

Take care everyone,Buttons

[Gracie]

Hi all...

I too could use some support...

I have lots of pain issues (fibro, DDD, Osteoarthritis, Sciatica, Scoliosis, Nerve Root compression, old compression fracture, etc) and have been doing battle with the SSA for years now....

I am too tired to write any more right now, but my claim went BACK up to the Federal level....(2nd time now).

I've had 3 ALJ hearings.....the last one they raked me over the coals for being divorced, contacting my congressman, and things like that.

Many times now, I've felt like just giving up....

:mad:

[Buttons2]

We gotta get this forum going!

Gracie, I feel for you....don't even consider giving up! that's just what they are hoping for,they win-you lose!

what on earth does being divorced have to do with anything????:eek:

do you have a good lawyer?

Not sure if you are familiar with old BT or totally new here but we have lots of support/info. for dealing with this sort of thing. There should be a forum on here...

You hang in there, try to concentrate on the future & just take all this **** as it comes along. Alot of factors play into this,such as having a doctor behind you 100%. I know people that have gotten disability on the FIRST try!

Take care & try not to stress too much,I'm sure you are doing all you possibly can.

Buttons

[Tootsie]

Hi Gracie and welcome to the forums. I, too, have scoliosis, a 105 degree, thoracic curve that was fused over 50 years ago. The fibromyalgia came about 10 years later. However, I did manage to marry, have a family and even went back to work for 20 years, although it was only part time.

It sounds like you really got some response if everyone was so upset with you for advocating for yourself. I hope that they did not succeed in intimidating you as that is what they obviously were trying to do. Courage!

Buttons2 has good information. I hope some day we will be able to access some of the infomation in the old forums as it was so valuable. Cheerio.

[Gracie]

We gotta get this forum going!

Gracie, I feel for you....don't even consider giving up! that's just what they are hoping for,they win-you lose!

what on earth does being divorced have to do with anything????:eek:

do you have a good lawyer?

Not sure if you are familiar with old BT or totally new here but we have lots of support/info. for dealing with this sort of thing. There should be a forum on here...

You hang in there, try to concentrate on the future & just take all this **** as it comes along. Alot of factors play into this,such as having a doctor behind you 100%. I know people that have gotten disability on the FIRST try!

Take care & try not to stress too much,I'm sure you are doing all you possibly can.

Buttons


Hi Buttons:

Well, as far as the using my singleness against me (divorce) they try to imply that I am trying to milk the system because I am divorced and I almost hear a tone of condemnation for the divorce....I guess single people/parents don't need anything when they are fighting health issues????? They don't seem to get it. Whatever they can use I guess....

[Fig]

Hi Gracie.... I'm outraged by what you tell us! I can't believe how these people are treating you. It's wrong, wrong, wrong!!! I'm on SSI and I'm divorced. I have several physical problems and suffer from chronic clinical depression and anxiety. I think they granted the SSI just on the psych problem.

Where do you live? I think some areas are tougher than others. Just hang in there and keep trying. You deserve your benefits.
Marion

[Buttons2]

Gracie,if you wouldn't mind telling us the state you are residing in we might be able to provide more help. I'm in WA & have friends on disability & they never went through anything like this!

first the comments about being divorced & now your sexual experiences?? This doesn't sound right to me!

I do have some personal experience with courtooms/judges & realize some places are in the dark ages as far as how they treat women who are single parents! OK, I'll just say it-Nebraska has got to be one of the most awful places I've ever been to!

Real life is certainly NOT like what we see on TV!

What exactly is the lawyer doing for you? Are you on a contract for X amount of time for this person to represent you? I've had more experience with lawyers than I care to recall,they are very intiminating!

Also, your age might be a factor,again I'll go first-I'm 57 & believe me I've had some strange life experiences. If you are young you will be pushed around.....and you will be trusting professionals that just might not deserve your faith in them.

For Pete's sake,doctor's don't even bother reading records so what makes this therapist believe any judge would?? This is not right. Without having your medical team behind you 100% (that means willing to write a darn letter),you are on too much of an uphill battle (my opinion).

Let us know how we can help. We are here for you! I've not gone for disability myself so don't have first hand experience but I can do research & try to encourage you!

Are there any social service programs available to you? Transportation? Are you limited in the choice of medical care? What is your PCP doing for you? Has he/she written a letter for the court?

Hopefully someone with more experience will come along & provide some good info for you.

Hang in,Buttons

[Boopers]

Hi Fig, (and the rest of you),

So sorry all of you and "me" are having a tough time. I think the winter months make it worse, at least, it seems to be that way with me.

Hoping for better days for you all!!

Take care,
Linda

[Sunshine2]

Gracie,if you wouldn't mind telling us the state you are residing in we might be able to provide more help. I'm in WA & have friends on disability & they never went through anything like this!

first the comments about being divorced & now your sexual experiences?? This doesn't sound right to me!

I do have some personal experience with courtooms/judges & realize some places are in the dark ages as far as how they treat women who are single parents! OK, I'll just say it-Nebraska has got to be one of the most awful places I've ever been to!

Real life is certainly NOT like what we see on TV!

What exactly is the lawyer doing for you? Are you on a contract for X amount of time for this person to represent you? I've had more experience with lawyers than I care to recall,they are very intiminating!

Also, your age might be a factor,again I'll go first-I'm 57 & believe me I've had some strange life experiences. If you are young you will be pushed around.....and you will be trusting professionals that just might not deserve your faith in them.

For Pete's sake,doctor's don't even bother reading records so what makes this therapist believe any judge would?? This is not right. Without having your medical team behind you 100% (that means willing to write a darn letter),you are on too much of an uphill battle (my opinion).

Let us know how we can help. We are here for you! I've not gone for disability myself so don't have first hand experience but I can do research & try to encourage you!

Are there any social service programs available to you? Transportation? Are you limited in the choice of medical care? What is your PCP doing for you? Has he/she written a letter for the court?

Hopefully someone with more experience will come along & provide some good info for you.

Hang in,Buttons

Hi, sorry for taking so long to respond, I had another round of asthma related bronchitis because of the cold weather kicking in and then, fell down and got a concussion as a result of being too dizzy when getting up from sleep....

It's been a rough several of months, if you ask me......

I know you guys want to help but from where you are at, you can't help me, I've actually got a high level state advocate type of a person on my side who is breathing down the necks of the lower level advocate types that also were recently assinged to me (which should have been assigned to me years ago now) I WONDER IF I SHOULD SUE ABOUT THAT?????

I am just so sick and tired of the entire system, it is making me tired. What I don't understand EITHER is how they are NOW trying to make me look so mentally unstable just to get my darn disability..........!!!! What I am saying is that.........heck, a broken back, DDD, Osteoarthritis, fibromyalgia, sciatica, scoliosis, nerve root compression, neuropathy, asthma, migraines, anemia, etc ISn"T ENOUGH????????? nor the CHRONIC PAIN.........nor the depression, PTSD, anxiety either?................no, they gotta make ya look even Worse than all that before they will consider giving you any social security......

It just infuriates me, makes me angry, sad, upset, depressed, etc...........I am tired from all of this,,,,,,,,,

Sick and tired of being sick and tired.....

Well.............I will let ya know what happens next.........

This week I had some pastor somewhere writing and begging me for money, so I wrote him back, he published my letter on his website (without my permission) and then read it on the sermon he did, too.........then, sends me everything and gives me a phone number in case i have any questions............

:mad:

For some reason, this pastor whom I've never heard preach until today, wants my money. I tried to tell him I have no money for him..........so I guess the next step was to shame me into giving him some money, well its not gonna work. :rolleyes:

GBY

[Sunshine2]

Oh, and I forgot my other name and couldn't get the info so I registered as Sunshine2 but its me, Gracie.............can ya tell I'm a blonde TOO?????

[Buttons2]

Oh Gracie, this is pathetic huh?

Hey, you've joined me in being a 2!:rolleyes: The person who "stole" my name never even came onboard here so grateful for that!

I've got to make a decision soon about applying for SSI myself. Getting pretty depressed with having no income. I'm self employed but can only bring in $$ half the year, other half I have zero income & it's finally getting to be too much.

One of the biggest reasons I haven't pursued this is the STRESS it will bring on. Just thinking of finding a new doc gives me the shivers!

I understand how frustrated you must be, and going for a mental disability when you aren't "crazy" is making it all worse. I'd advise you to go with whatever works. Why? Cause it might be the easiest route to take,plain & simple. Unless the judge has dealt with chronic pain he/she will look at you & think you must be OK. Recall all the doctor's who have considered you to be healthy, all the family members/friends that believe you are OK. The simple truth is that pain doesn't show-and I read somewhere that if you can be a "greeter" at Wal-Mart then you are considered employable!!:eek: So I will go that route,send me to a shrink,I don't care! Pain makes a person nuts! I've thought of the fact that if I had a job giving people shopping carts @ Wal-Mart I might send the cart out the door instead! Whatever it takes right?

Hang in, that's all you can do. You've already gone this far, and you know you have to succeed eventually right?

Were you able to find a forum for SSI?

Question-who pays for these advocates? How do you get one?

Even people with MS & in wheelchairs get turned down for disability, so keep that in mind-again it goes back to mental problems. I should have applied when my brain function was sooooo bad I didn't know my name,age or address!:D

Good luck & glad you came back!
Buttons

[joy]

hello everyone. i'm just getting back to this. i'm sorry everyone is having such a rough time. i am too but think i'm finally getting a little better. i went just before Christmas and got a fast acting and a slower acting cortisone shot. i used to say it not only helped my allergy problems and my aches and pains but i thought it helped my mind as well. my doctor took that as i might be bipolar. whatever, i just know if you are in pain and anything helps, even just a bit, your spirits and mood will improve some! he gave me some medicine and then i don't think he thought that any longer. i asked how he would know. he replied that if i was bipolar i would act really different. i didn't, so guess i'm not. but i didn't mind one bit relaying that information to the social security people as well before anything was determined about it. people can't help having a chemical imbalance any more than they can control the weather.

so got the shots in December and went on a short trip, I hardly ever get out of the house little on go anywhere. so that helped. husband and i took our grandaughter to someplace close to home and let her swim in an indoor pool on her Christmas break. that was not to stressful and was really sorta relaxing so that helped. i was sorta down upon returning, had all the dirty clothes, house in worse shape from trying to drag things out to pack and all the Christmas decorations to take down and pack. but i did a little every now and then and can tell i've made some headway. waah way. well i'm trying to give a little cheer here, lol.

i also bought something for the house. i haven't done that in ages so that gave me a little boost. and i keep telling myself that spring will get here eventually.

my brother came by the other day and said he had some questions for us. i couldn't imagine what it was but turns out his boss gave him a rotten deal. he has worked in construction for this man for years, at almost 67 it is getting very hard. the boss left town and let two younger guys tell brother he was laid off for awhile. then, turn in your truck and radio. then not invited to Christmas party so therefore no Christmas bonus! that was nothing but tacky. just a few weeks before Christmas! so he was wanting to know about filing for disability. he has arthritis and his knees are really bad. i don't see how he has done it this long. he is suppose to be construction foreman and not have to work but always has. the only advice i could give him was to be prepared to get depressed! it was hard on me. but i stuck with it and even though it went all the way before it was overturned, it was nerve wracking. i also advised him to just go ahead and get a lawyer. so i'm waiting to see how it goes with? i'm sorry, can't recall who is trying but that's just my bad memory for you.

sorry it took so long to get back with you all but i'll try and be a better person about checking back in. it certainly helps to have someone or many "someones" who will listen and respond to you. i have more online buddies than i do any other kind now. and they suite me just fine and are more understanding and "there" for me than any friends i used to have when i was healthy and could go places.

[Tootsie]

Hi Joy,
Welcome back to BT! All the forums seem to be much slower, both in loading and in responses by members. I guess everyone drifted away to other Internet support forums and groups. Yet, there are some of us who continue to read and post regularly. I hope you will be joining us.

I, too, took several days to get all the Christmas things put boxed up and put away. For me, it always works much better, if I can putter and vary my tasks. I sit for a while, stand or move around, sit down again, read, put a load of laundry in, etc. Functioning at someone else's pace just doesn't work well.

I don't think your brother would be eligible for Disability due to his age. He should file for Social Security and should have a decent income as he has worked past the age of 65. A phone call or visit to his local Social Security Office should answer all his questions. The folks there are usually very helpful and used to dealing with us seniors.

As for being laid off, there may be some merit is investigating whether he is a victim of age discrimination. Most phone books have a listing for the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, or EEOC. A phone call to them would clarify the issue. In our local office, there is a recording on the phone and you need to leave a message and contact number where you can be reached. Cheerio.

[Buttons2]

Joy, this is an all to common thing these days, longtime workers kicked out so the younger ones can take over. Hope he get's enough unemployment comp to pay his bills! He needs to go to SS office & let them advise on what's the best thing to do, he was probably counting on working til age 71?? He'd probably be that age by the time he got disability & then have lawyer fees also....maybe you could post on the forum here for disability, I'm far from an expert on all this.

You guys have actually put away your Christmas decor??:rolleyes: Want to come help me? I have managed to throw out some lights.....less is more right? I didn't even get a tree up this year, and then one son came over & commented how much decor I had up!:eek:

Saving my energy for springtime, which can't come soon enough for me!

Take care everyone,Buttons

[joy]

so i'm not the only one that is looking forward to spring then? don't know why as it used to make me restless. i guess because i wanted to do so much. but now it will just be nice to walk to mailbox and have it a little bit plesanter. the flip side i lament about not getting snow anymore, lol. well maybe the restlessness has started early this year.

about my brother and his job, my brother has always been sorta mild mannered. his wife is a spitfire, younger in fact so when he was talking about it he replied to my hubby, linda will have a thing or two to tell him (his boss) when she sees him.

not to be ugly but i'm the one that took care of my mother the most. and to be honest i've though, gee if mother could have made it two more years, brother might have had time to help more. but i'm not bitter about it. i doubt he would have done more even if he wasn't working. he's my brother and i gave him my best advice so i have it covered. he'll have to figure out the rest himself. my husband and him get along just fine and in fact are really close so the two of them will work on projects together. both can do just about anything and between both families there is the home place to be taken care of. the men will stay busy. it will be me left at home more without company, lol. but that's okay, i'm getting used to it, in fact going places only makes me hurt more and tire me out. i'm thankful i have a computer and friends that do too.

oh yes, i read several other pn boards but post here the most. i just passed the time away reading other places while bt was down. i did join the national peripheral neuropathy community while it was down. and many here are members there as well. but i just kinda like it here so just waited patiently until it was back up. i read mostly at neurotalk and did join finally as i wanted to see some pictures that i would not have been able too if i had not joined. i love looking at beautiful places i'll probably never get to visit.

btw, the Christmas stuff is still in the garage. but there is no way i can get it into the outside barn where it goes. i gave up on storing things in the attic the last time i fell. now if it is still ther when it gets warmer and the ground dries out, maybe i'll try and load the lightest stuff onto my golf cart and drive it out there. bless my aunt. she and uncle never had children so i inhereted $5000 from her. so i bought myself a nice golf cart for $1000 and put rest into the bank. brother bought himself a really nice expensive 4-wheeler and no money in bank! he has already decided that since they have a pretty nice camper, not new, but nice, and that they could just visit the parks around here and shut off the electricity if they have too. they both love to camp. so he has been thinking about it. sounds like a plan to me. maybe hubbby and i could join them some. we have a place to go in the summer. hubby even bought me a ski doo (that's what i call it, lol). it is a jet ski. i may not can drive my tahoe that well some days i stay home more than i go if i have to drive) but i can handle that jet ski as well as any 60 year old can for what all i've got wrong with me, lol. i have been driving more lately since i have cut down on my medicine so i'm also thankful for that. well that's a lot outta me for now. i'll check back in later. hope everyone is doing pretty good and finding something to enjoy everyday at least. the other day it was pouring down rain and was so dreary. a littlllllllllllle birdy was singing his heart out! and i enjoyed his song very much. does anyone else have that problem of holding the keys down too long with their numb hands and fingers?

[Cry Tears]

Hi all....You guys would laugh:eek: ...maybe not...my living room looks like the tree exploded all over the place. No energy to undo the mess....I should just toss it all in the trash! But I'd never find some of the goodies I've saved and horded! LOL!
Anyway...I'm glad I'm not the only one who's got Christmas stuff hanging around. Gosh...its going to be Valentines day soon!
Now thats what I call tacky!
Hey....should I post a picture here to show you the mess? LOL!
Maybe it will shame me into getting it clean.
We've had sunshine here in Oregon! WOW! After all that cold weather and snow, 50* sure feels good!:D
I'll reward myself with ANOTHER cookie....just for thinking about taking down the decorations! I mean just thinking is a fete in itself isn't it?!?! LOL!
Blessings, cheryl

[joy]

pictures of a mess, boy do i ever have a doozy. it was of my den that took the prize. but don't think i'll post it. glad to hear you had some sunshine cheryl. that certainly help me some. i hate dreary dark days. i used to not mind a few drizzly days. i'd just dig out my recipes and look through them and most of the time pick something to make. whether i ever made it or not, it helped just daydreaming about it. i have craft books galore that i did the same thing with. cross stitcch books, cake decorating books and oil painting. well you get the picture. i could open up my own crafts store, lol. book store too. need to unload all of it for more room. someday maybe. hope everyone has a good weekend. my grandaughter is here and sick. so is my daughter. it's 4:03 am and i've had NO sleep so i will probably be next. it will be doctor tommorrow for grandaughter. daughter went today and has bronchitis. granddaughter also has congestion but upset stomach and vomiting. there is a stomach virus going around her school. temp was 101.6 last time i checked. had to put her in tup as she had the chills, hot and cold. hopefull she is resting now. guess i'd better try also.

[Buttons2]

Well, grab a cup of coffee or tea and join the winter shut-ins! We've had sunshine lately also & the dreadful wind storms seem to be over. I know that cold, dreary weather can't possibly be helping anyone's pain or depression. I tend to watch too much worthless TV & read alot if I remember to buy new books when go to Costco.....

Now that I have the DR table cleared of Christmas stuff what did I do? Got out all my buttons to reorganize & bag up for my first sale this spring, well-that was several days ago, I have done nothing but ignore them since! How do you regain your enthusiasm? How do you get motivated? Come on....share your secrets! Are there any motivator pills?:rolleyes:

I just finished reading a really good book, one of those you cannot put down, "Memoirs of a Geisha", it's a fictional story but full of interesting info about the Japanese culture & what it's like to be sold as a motherless child & become basically a slave, the "lucky" ones became Geisha! There are some good life lessons described in this book & as you read the horrid stuff that happens to this woman you tend to forget about your own pain......

How's everyone gonna get through this week? Care to share your goals? I'm planning to work in the "shed", major project that will take me days to complete, begin with throwing out trash!:eek: How many of you agree that too much clutter just clogs up our lives? Maybe we don't notice it so much when we had our health, but now just looking @ all the "stuff" drives me bonkers! I can hardly wait for a warm enough spring day to open the doors & air everything out, smell the blooms & drive around seeing new colts,calves,ewes,etc. I did see a new calf the other day.....at least it wasn't in one of those plastic veal containers! (They look like big dog igloo's & are @ all the dairy farms around here-when I learned what they were I swore off veal!)

Take care everyone......Buttons the lazy,crazy lady!

[Tootsie]

For some reason, after the holidays, I get into all those things that I've postponed for at least a year. I've gone through several "piles." At least I get them sorted out so all the magazines that have articles I want to read are in one pile. Recipes that I've clipped and want to check into further, before deciding whether I want to try them, are in a huge paper clip. All the clean paper goes into a bag to recycle, and miscellaneous things are put where they really belong.

I wish that I didn't get so fatigued and worn out that I could deal with these things as they occur. It sure would save me time and energy. Sometimes when the clutter gets so bad, it takes me several tries to really get going.

My current project is making doll clothes for a granddaughter whose birthday is coming up. There is a new grandson, so it is really appropriate for her to have her own, "baby." I've been on a knit and crochet kick and my hands are bothering me so I have to find something else to occupy them.
Cheerio.

[Buttons2]

Well, it was 3pm before I finally got myself motivated yesterday. It was cold,40 degrees & dreary, I put on gloves,hat & jacket & marched myself out to the dreaded shed mess....why? Cause I wanted to be able to write today that I'd actually done something worthwhile! Once I got going I stayed warm & I didn't lift anything heavy, I got alot done & it felt soooo good!:)

I've concluded that it's up to me to fight back with this awful fatique,now I realize that there are some days when it's just not possible cause my legs/feet are so bad, but many of those days I'm velcroed to my recliner I'm beginning to think is more habit than actual pain. OR, perhaps I'm actually improving!:D Whatever, I'll take all the improvements I can get!

Tootsie, do you have arthritis in your hands? If so, please try my Castor Oil cure for the pain, you could put it on @ night with cotton gloves (it's very greasy), and it might help. I use it on my knees,course I also take
Tylenol,etc. when pain is really bad & fingers too stiff to do much. If I do too much with my hands one day-I have to pay the piper the next day when I can't even button anything or open a container!

Take care,Buttons

[joy]

i was motivated yesterday too. so it is now 4pm and i haven't even taken my morning meds, lol, because i stayed in bed. woke up in awful pain so then had to sleep to recoup my strength. brough home stuff that i had stored at mothers' so home is back in sorta a mess. but i have to try or else i'll never know what i have at mother's that i might want. i found a family picture of hubby's and a picture of my two kids, back when they got along. so wouldn't want to lose that as i may never see that again in my life. not a lol here for sure.

i did find the ceramic Christmas tree that my sister in law asked for quite quickly the day of the funeral. my own children were NOT present and my brother's kids all lived out of town so i let them into the house. when i gave it to brother he did not act happy at all was surprised in fact. i just said dryily well linda asked for it so here it is! it will probably end up with one of her kids but that's all she or any of them are going to get i've decided. they got their pick that day and i paid for the burial everything out of money i had saved from mother's pitifually small checks and the rest was hubby and mines. ilater found out they had took out a loan so guess thery spend the momey on what they wanted, probably bills. i have to admit i was alitle upset when i found out brother had let one of his wife's kids put up his land, big part of it, for a PERSONAL loan, not one that he and his wife and 4 kids had made together, but for a personal loan. so guess if that fall through, well who know who will be my neighbors if i ever do get to move out on that land. so for me it's a done deal now. i got mother and now i have fulfilled everything that they have asked for, mother's quilts and any objects she made in ceramics. they got the cake and icing too on that one.

but don't think i'm feeling sorry. nope. i took mother to a ceramics class with me. she helped me clean the tree and a few more things. i dated it. did not put her initals on it but i have my memories. a Christmas tree mother and i made together. so i really got the best all the way around and as march comes around this year i'm going to try and keep that thought in my mind. i did the very best i could for as long as i could. and i have more good memories than bad.

funny thing is, mother had told me just what to give brother. so we did not even think about the Christmas tree. linda did so she got it. but i did get the two kittens that mother made. after mentioning that i liked them and probably one of the kids would get them, she took a pencil and etched my initals on the,m. i did not know that until i picked them up after she had died. so she made sure i did get some of the things i did love. she took care of me and i did her. i do miss that, having someone who would be there for you no matter what.

[Buttons2]

Joy, I'm not familiar with your story.....I'm thinking you (recently?) lost your mother & you had been her caregiver? Now that she's gone all the wicked relatives are showing their greed? I'm sorry you've had to go through all this stress & anquish!

BIG CYBER HUG to you!!

You've got the right attitude, remember the good/positive aspects, you can't change what other people do anyways right?

I've never had to go through this, my parents are both still alive & in fact today is their 59th anniversary. Very grateful they are both still getting around & able to take care of themselves.

My energy stayed with me throughout yesterday, so I continued to clear out junk & organize the office. Got every bit of Christmas stuff put away-yeah!!

Woke up in middle of night in horrific pain, like nothing I've ever felt before & in places I never knew could hurt so much! Now I feel like road kill. Think I'll just curl up with a good book. This is sooooo infuriating! I do it everytime! Days I feel OK, I buzz around like my old self-then wham!

We have heavy fog this morning so figure that might be a factor?

Hope you remember to take your meds today! Hang in there,spring isn't too far away.

Buttons

[joy]

thanks, i'll be fine. i just always over. but it doesn't happen but once or twice a year now so that's not so bad, lol.

no no greed really, just petty stuff. and i'm truly over it. i did want to give them what they asked for. but sil asked for me to consider giving what i did not want to her daughter. and there my own children had not even had a chance inside the house. i thought it was nice of me to let brother's kids inside as they are spread out. and it was a horrible day with grave caving in, the tomb stone from daddy's and mother's falling in grave and almost losing the small tombstone of my aunts little babies. it was one of those days you kept wondering how much worse could it get! but made it through it. it was a long wait at brother's house for them to get everything so we could go look at the grave and it took it's toll on me. and my brother too. so i'm not bitter. i sound like i'm mad at brother. i sorta am as he lets wife tell him what to do and her mother got better attention from brother than his own mother. my hubby and my brother are fairly close. even have worked together and both are in fire department. it's just sil and her mouth, it's all talk with her. and the mentioning of her daughter, who never did anything for mother at all, etc. it was just too much i was asked to consider her before my own children who did SEE granny. that is why i said i had fullfilled my obligations. so it is over. i wouldn't have took him the tree if i felt otherewise. wink wink. now i see that they can't ask for anything else. i'm thinking since i donate things to charity myself instead of trying to have a sale. well our church is having a sale in spring. so anything i don't want, i may just donate to that. sounds right to me.

[Tootsie]

You ladies have been very busy and I am thinking that with all your inspiring stories, I should have accomplished more in the past few days. I felt a little pushed and began setting impossible goals for myself so just stopped doing anything and read the newspaper every day.

Now, I think I can go back and resume my projects! Thanks for your inspiring stories. Cheerio.

[joy]

that's good. but if you only knew how little i did accomplish, lol. it did make me see that i do have to get all my stuff from mother's house (we stored everything we could while our hardwood floors were being laid) and get it over with. i get the house looking a little better, then make a trip and bring back more stuff, then am down in the dump loking at all i have to find a place for!

so i'm searching through it all and then i'm going to ELIMINATE everything i can. it is a plan. and God willing if i live maybe 5 more years, i'll get it all done, lol. one thing for sure, i won't get it done sitting in the recliner. but i do have to take time out when i do work. pain demands it.

[Tootsie]

Joy,
I find that all those moments I spend sitting in the recliner before another episode of activity on my feet, offers a good chance to make lists and prioritize just what I want to accomplish. It does help me sort out what is really important and what can wait for another day. Cheerio.

[Buttons2]

:D Not likely eh ladies????

I'm trying to stay out of my recliner, take breaks there & get my feet up though.

Joy, I dread the day I might have to do what you have ahead of you! Since I don't live near my parents I kinda figure my niece will steal everything of any value before I get there.....I've never been too sentimental & I don't have any grandchildren, so @ this point I look at all the "stuff" as just that-stuff. It won't replace the people we loved & lost.

Since I'm in the antique business I've had to deal with people selling off estates, I've seen how bitter they are over someone getting something they felt they should have (or were always led to believe they'd inherit). We can't force our parent's to be responsible about making their intentions known ahead of time, and of course we cannot predict when we will die, what we can do is keep the peace & move on. You've done this!

Laws are different depending on where you live, but I think it's important for survivors to wait at least 6 mos before making decisions & selling or giving away possessions. Too many decisions have to be made quickly as it is.

I recall when my grandfather died, I was not in the area at the time & when I went to his apartment other relatives had cleaned out everything from family photos to the pantry! We eventually got the photos back & I'm just grateful they weren't thrown out. My thought is that if someone wants you to have any possession they should just gift it to you while they are still alive!

Tootsie, I also make lists, and I've recently decided to divide it by priority & break the task up into something I can do that won't take too long,then I get to cross that off & take a break & go onto the next task. Right now I'm surrounded by 100's of buttons, & still have alot to get done...if my cat comes along & destroys what I've gotten separated I swear I'll give her away!:rolleyes:

If I could rid myself of 35# I'm sure I'd have more energy!:eek: I feel like a yoyo, when I feel pretty good I'm so grateful & I try "catch up", then I fall to the bottom....happens everytime! Guess I just have to accept this as my life now, but how do you do that?

Take care everyone,Buttons

[joy]

ahh buttons did i not say mother told me what to make sure i gave to my brother? she did. but now don't make mor of this than i have. i love my brother and really do, really do appreciate that my second sister-in-law takes good care of my brother. but as for his kids, her kids, my sil will tell anyone in a heartbeat how much better hers are, lol. they pay BACK their bill. other don't even ask for money. etc. junk like that. that's what it all is junk. pis*y thought sometimes when i feel back etc. a woman said this morning in church, i'd not have given him that Christmas tree. i'm not like that. there are really two things that i have a hard time parting with that belong in families,, one is made out of wood and the other is land. so i have wood furniture, not expensive but one was my greatgrandparents bedroom suite. i gave a dresser to my neice because she asked. did not give her the one she wanted, but there again, i'm not a complete idiot. i did give her one though.

brother did not ask for much but he did "ask" for exactly what mother said to give him! so i felt good about it. now sil. really she should have kept her mouth shut and let brother and his kids do the talking. but she didn't. did i say that her kids did not make an apperance? it had always been that way. my mother was POOR. as soon as 2 new kids entered the picture, well my kids got less but they got exactly what all did. it was usually something homemade. most didn't appreiate it but mother would never give my kids any more than brother's or new grandkids. she was fair. but by the time all were grown she knew who really cared about even seeing her and who didn't. so she did not tell me to give the kids anything. not even mine. she had given them some smallish trinkets things that i know some still treasure. i am so lucky to have a good mother. i always knew some things wre different but i always reminded myself that HER mother died by the time she was 6! she got none of that lovey dovey stuff. so did not hand out much. but i knew i was loved by the time i was an adult. and since i was still at home when daddy died and i was 20 and daddy had ben sick for 2 or more years, mother and i clung together. yep, i was lucky. many don't have that. right or wrong we always worked things out. her best help she left me with is this "you'[ve got to help yourself". she'd listen to my complain9ng about things sometimes for just awhile but that is what i'd always hear. she never had anyone to listen to her and she knew how to make it without much people support. it's a lot to consider now that i am facing less and less people in my life. but i had a great teacher so i think i'll make it. :-)

buttons i do better when i don't over do myself and i've finally almost learned that lesson. i'm so glad that when i got my two shots this last time that i went on a mini vacation with husband. of course we took emilee. but we won't always be doing that soon i know. she getting to where she likes to memore active than we can be. but it will all work out.

hope everyone has s good next week. i enjoy hearing how all are doing. whether it's good or bad.

bty my dog and i are making some improvement. more improvements than backsets so far. and that helps my spirits more than anything right now.

[Buttons2]

Fig, if you're out there let us know how you are doing OK? You started this thread & then it evolved into something else....that happens on BT, but we want to assure you we are still here for support for YOU!

Joy, hope you will have a good week!

Cheryl, we are waiting to hear from you after your trip!

Everyone, let us know how you're doing.....

Buttons

[joy]

guess what? i had bought some things for curtains the nice thingys that go on the wall to run a curtain rod through. my mind boy don't have much of one do i? well anyway i had told cheryl that i had bought a new bedspread and curtains. so hubby finally got them put up today. yeah. he had to put a big board behind the wall sconces so that it would go over the drape part. he cut around it and glued it onto the sconces and i did some of that artsy stuff chery is always talking about and matched the paint job pretty good. so no one is going to be close enough to tell that it is pieced together i'm pretty sure. and now i need to drag out the steamer and get all the wrinkles out of the drapes. they had huge gommet holes? does that sound right, so that i can slide them easily. it makes me feel better to have up something other than the cheap plastic things i had up for years.

i'm hoping hubby will put as much into fixing up our place as he does when it comes to doing something for the community when he finishes the job at the church. his health is iffy too and i sure know how depressing it will be if we get stuck having to look at the sorry inside of the house if we need to be down for any length of time.

just a little progress is encouraging. i was like most women that loved to change the furniture around. no more. i could "walk" our china cabinet full of dishes all accross the room without breaking anything. but if hubby and son got ahold of it it would be arguing and broken things just about every time, lol. i think men just don't have the patience for moving things. or for slow drivers either come to think of it.

come on warmer weather. we have had our snow now and weather under freezing for about 2 weeks. i'm ready to think about putting out the feeders for my hummingbirds. come on march. well have hubby hang them for me. i can't safely hang them anymore but i can keep everything else done if he will hang them for me. they are usually at my kitchen window by the second week in march. they sure are fun to watch. i often wonder how a sickly bird manages. i bet they just do not last. i know they have to eat an awful lot of food so they can't take time off for feeling lousy. something for me to think about while i'm waiting for them to come visit. i'll let you all know if it gets me to moving more than usual next week. i sure don't have family or friends visit like the old days. that got me to moving every time as i looked forward to company. being down and having to stay in wheelchair and on couch for two years sure let others forget about me. if you can't go out to eat or shop well i was just no fun. never mind i didn't want to lose any of my feet. i have been very fortunate to not get any infections or ulcers in quite some time now and i'm so thankful.

ps i wondered who was calling so late as the phone ran as soon as i hit submit. it is 12:20 here and husband just got a call to go to our fire district. there has been a fire with afatalitie he was informed. i'm hoping it is misinformation and a mistake. if not pray for the remaining family if there is any and for friends of this family. i went through all the classes and was an EMT in my younger days. i can say that i sure do not miss going to the tradgedies. it takes forever to get your life back to to where you can sleep etc.

[Buttons2]

Well perhaps Fig is doing OK? Hope so! Cheryl seems to always be busy! I had some warmer weather & it sure helped me to get some things done. Of course I was down all day yesterday but that's OK too,getting used to it by now I suppose.

Joy, that's wonderful that you've gotten a new bedroom look! We spend a great deal of our lives in our bed areas so it should be pleasant to surround ourselves with nice color, & fabrics!

I'm soooo grateful I don't live where the snow is right now! What happens to all the animals when there's 11' of snow!:eek:

I live north of Seattle, the daffodils are coming up in the fields! If the weather remains mild the tulips will be up & gone before our annual Tulip Festival!

Almost afraid to post this-for past several weeks my knees have NOT been hurting me. No idea why this has been the case,since I've suffered from knee pain since I was a child. I'll take all the relief I can get though!

Hey, I finally did manage to complete my button project! I just kept at it everyday until I could mark it off my list. Now I have a sewing project to do,I haven't sewn anything in many years-threading the needle is my first challenge. :rolleyes:

Hope everyone had a good weekend & is geared up for the week ahead!

Joy, sure hope the fire didn't have a fatality,is your husband a firefighter?

Take care everyone, look forward to your replies,Buttons

[Tootsie]

My current project is making doll clothes for a grandchild who has a new brother. However, the pattern I had, is for a mature doll and the doll I'm using is a baby doll. Making a pattern is the worst part of the problem, then fitting it and adjusting, etc. It has taken me much longer than I anticipated.

My other project is relearning how to bake using gluten free flour! A grandson who lives locally, has been found to be gluten sensitve, so I have been haunting the Gluten Forum here. The folks there are really, really helpful and I've learned a lot.

Our fruit trees are blooming, the daffodils are coming along and spring is in the air. I'm ready and sneezing already. cheerio.

[joy]

hello you all. yes i think cheryl has been busy helping with church valentine projects. they are so lucky to have her as she jumps in wholeheartly and works herself to death.

i checked to see when the last time fig was on here. i remember her beani signature from before. it was sad about one of her birds dying. hopefully if she reads this she will respond and let us know how she is doing as we've all been wondering about her.

tootsie i used to be able to make the most complicated costumes and without a pattern. notice the used to part though. i too have trouble threading a machine and keeping one running. and i used to work at a shoe factory making hush puppie shoes doing the sewing. seattle, that sounds just beautiful. aw guess i never will get over my want to travel feelings. i have always wanted to travel at least since high school. hubby is not as interested and kids did not even want to go to disney world once they found out how far it was. little S**ts then went later when they were older with friends and i still haven't been anywhere much, lol.

and buttons i'm proud you accomplished your button task. i'm now working on another one. i really wish i could just pretend we have not used that comforter for about a week. that thing is so thick and HOT. i turn the heat down to 65 and we still burn up. and this has been even when our weather has been under freezing for the last couple of weeks. it's just too much. but oh so pretty. i know what will happen since we can't really sleep under it. it will just lay somewhere piled up and be in the way. if we could sleep under it i might just straighten it up sometimes and take the time to toss the pretty pillows on it. guess you can tell my housekeeping skills are nil.

it is so good to hear you have been without knee pain buttons. i'll pray that continues. and it is so good that we have the gluten forum for everyone that needs it right tootsie. how did they discover that that was your grandson's problem? testing or process of elimination. i've always wondered but never checked into it all that much. guess i should have since i have pn but just kinda gave up after the mayo clinic.

hearing about all the flowers blooming is encouraging. but yep it makes me sneeze up a storm too and the winds are a bother with my ears and menieres. maybe it won't freeze all the buds and they will bloom.


yes there was a fatality. at first the word was that there might be three. it is always sad. i used to be an EMT so i joined the fire department and went through the fd classes as well. we used to drag our kids out at night to every one. hubby has been the fire chief since day one and is still in it. but after some injuries and asthma acting up i just kinda got out of it after several more people became emergency medical technicians. i became an emt so i could be my own first aider for my brownie troop. then left the brownies to help with the fire department. had all the excitement and then some so don't miss it at all now that health is bad. i have seen it all, tornadoes, wrecks, deaths in fire, tiny babies while doing my time in ER and wouldn't have missed it but won't be doing it any more either.

hubby's heart was out of rhythum for over the 36 hours so he had to go to
ER. he now has different doctors and different hospital and it really was a wasted trip. they will have to admit him and keep him at least 3 days and he did what the other doctors told him. the new ones gave him plavix and sent him home. his health problems are just about like mine in that there is not much they seem to be able to do for it. he had to get on antidepressants when i got so bad so i'm thinking it's now my turn to try them again as it does wear on your nerves a bit. but we'll keep our chin up and keep plugging on.

i hope everyone has a better week also. a good one is nice but i'm feeling greedy, now i want a great one, lol.

and marion if you are still around let us know how you are doing ok?

[Tootsie]

Joy, to answer your question about my grandson, his Mom works in a school district and there has been a lot of talk, information, etc among educational people that autism and gluten sensitivity seem to be linked. It is not a definite cause and effect type of thing but they do seem to function better, in some cases, when gluten is eliminated.

My grandson, was considered by some of his teachers in grammar school to be ADHD. However, my daughter refused to have him tested in any way because she did not want to use any of those drugs that they give children. She worked with him, sent him to a tutor, etc. When he got to adolescence, he got really severe acne. It all seemed to point to diet so she gave it a try. It has been an unqualified success. We are grateful. Oh, now, if only all our problems could be resolved like that! Cheerio.

[joy]

well it is s good to hear of a success story. that's something to be glad for. there is so much misery that good news is most welcome.;)